new parenting series 'flesh and blood'

[shrub]

new series starts today called 'flesh and blood', bbc1 mon-fri 12.30 1.00pm. don't know if its any good but may be of interest to mumsnetters out there

Oh good, makes a change for it to be on normal telly

My god, that little girl was soooooo much like my Dd2.

I would love to have parenting lessons to help me deal withe her. Anyone know how to go about it ??

nutcracker - yes i know what you mean. all the interesting tv is on bbc3 which i haven't got i don't know of anything specific for parenting lessons though think they should be compulsory! i went to a talk at my ds1's school called nvc(non-violent communication, also known as compassionate communication which they use. it has changed everthing around for us. similar to what child psychologist was teaching in the programme. if interested go to www.nvc.org and look at 'parenting' article. one example is that i use to have problems trying to get my ds1 to tidy up. they taught me to whittle down toys to a minimum (rotate them when bored) and have a routine 'time to tidy up' and a place for them so it helps them understand why we tidy up. explain short positive sentence why 'we need to tidy up the train set otherwise we could hurt ourselves by stepping on the track.'. or 'the track could get broken - lets put the track away. it will make mummy happy as the room will be tidy and the track will be safe and ready to play with tomorrow'. lots of positive reinforcement, teaching them to manage their emotions without threatening 'no choclate then'which the mum did at the beginning just teaches them to power struggle . can't remember anymore but hopes it give you an idea

That scene with the boy in the toy shop was APPALLING!!!!! My jaw was by my knees all through it - and then they said 'we don't spoil him with toys' and 'Oh well I've always liked shopping'!!!!!

miranda2 - i thought that too. what hope has their ds got if mummy and daddy live for shopping. thats probably all he knows. the old saying its not the children that need the toys - its the toy companies that need the children! we recently moved house and our ds1 has most of his stuff still in boxes. he hasn't asked for them and it makes me realise what little children really need which is what the psychologist was trying to tell them - he wanted to engage with his mum and dad. my ds1 one is great at improvising. i've realised if he is building a castle from his bricks, it doesn't mean i should go out and buy him one for xmas. its the act of 'making' that he enjoys. once he's finished making it he goes off and does something else.

You are right Shrub. I have been packing some of the kids toys for when we move and they haven't even noticed that they've gone.
I am guilty of buying them a bit too much only at birthdays and xmas though.

I thought the little girl was shocking too but she set alarms off in my head. Her and my dd, could be twins
I often let her think she is in charge just to get a bit of peace. Wrong i know but it's been going on for sooo long i don't know how to change it.

Some people have even commented on how patient i am with dd. I have to laugh at that, i'm not patient at all, just all out of ideas on what to do.

Miranda I know what you mean.

I must be a very cruel mother as I wouldn't dream of spending that much on ds twins birthdays (unless I was really rich rather than skint and happy ) He didn't appreciate any of it either. Ds twins are in the middle of toddlerdom at the moment and are very good at embarrassing antics (see my Feeling Like A S* thread in Parenting to see how bad I felt one day!) If they did all that biscuit nonsense in the kitchen I'd walk out and leave them, not stand there arguing.

Tonight with Trevor McDonald had an interesting subject, teaching children the value of money. Seemed really effective.