Silly things we say to our children, any others?

[jsmummy]

My dp just pointed out that I say "it's like the Blackpool Illuminations in here" meaning "Do ALL the lights have to be on?" and that I must have picked this up from my own mother. The thing is, The Blackpool Illuminations were very impressive in her day, but are not so relevant today! Will stop saying it, pronto.

I also will stop saying "well, it's not the end of the world is it?" since ds asked yesterday "what would be the end of the world mummy?" Will say, "ah well, it's not important" from now on. Anyone else catch themselves using their mothers outdated expressions?

It's a bit black over Bills Mums' (ie: it looks like rain) - to which my dd turns to dh and says Mummy is being silly again.

'If the wind changes you'll stay like that'.

My mum always used to use "blood and stomach pills" as an expression of exasperation (better than "oh s*" I suppose). She also used to say "It's like the wreck of the Hesparus in here" if our room was messy. Does anyone know what the "Hesparus" (sp?) was? There's loads more, but I can't remember them at the mo.

The Wreck of the Hesperus was a poem by Longfellow. Very learned/poetic, your mum!

Last verse:
Such was the wreck of the Hesperus,
In the midnight and the snow!
Christ save us all from a death like this,
On the reef of Norman's Woe!

But the saying may well be nothing to do with that!

jsmummy - my dh, when he comes home from work in the winter, says our house looks like the Titanic...

(I wonder who Norman was?)

Thanks jsmummy. I always wondered. Unfortunately, my mum is no longer here to ask, and this has made me realise how much I miss her. It's sad how you only realise how important someone was once they're not around to tell them.

emsiewill - you have reminded me how much I miss my grandparents. I only wish now that I had listened more intently to their stories, sadly I can't remember the names of old family members and who did what.
sorry I cant think of anything daft that I say to the kids. I certainly do though, I am sure it will all be repeated back to me one day.

emieswill, my dad died last year and I still miss him. ds putting on a CD of There Once Was an Ugly Duckling set me off recently since I remember my dad singing it to me when I was small... Still, we're keeping these silly sayings going!

"Your father wasn't a glazier" meaning "I can't see through you" and "You'll fall over that lip" when the bottom lip goes out; "Were you born in a hospital with swinging doors?" (not closing the door behind you); "Your eyes are bigger than your stomach" (how silly does that sound really?!); "A goose stepped on my grave" when you get a little shiver for no reason; "Johnny's out of jail" when the petticoat or slip is showing out from the hem of your skirt/dress...my mum had a million of 'em!
I'm sure she must have got them from her mum before me, and I wonder if it is inevitable I will end up saying them too.
Another silly thing I thought of mum used to say in the heat of the moment: "Do you want a smack?" Like we're going to say "Oh yes please!"

When we asked my grandpa where he was going he'd say 'To see about a wigwam for a horse's bridle.' Never did fathom that one out!!! And if we asked how old he was, it was always 'The same age as my tongue and six months older than my teeth.' Other cheeky questions received the reply that 'It's none of your bees knees and chickens elbows.'

This thread is hilarious. My papa (grandfather) always used to say he was going to see a man about a dog when he was off to the pub. But as they had an old house with lots of draughts, they used "sausage dog" draught excluders all round the house. I had it in my head that he spent his evenings in difficult negotiations over the purchase of said dogs!

A new-minted one in our house is 'Don't eat with your mouth full!' - said by mistake once and often repeated

"Money doesn't grow on trees you know" used to be a regular when I was a kid, however in one frustrated moment when Mum discovered we'd eaten all the apples she'd planned to make a pie with, she frustratedly said "they don't grow on trees, you know..."
"But Mum......."
For some reason "do you want a slap around the face with a wet kipper?" features too from my Geordie upbringing... my ds (aged 2) thinks this is hilarious - probably something to do with his vision of a bedragggled Mick Inkpen's "Kipper"!

If we ever eat apple core we would have apple trees growing in our tummys. If you swalloed chewing gum all your insides would stick together. And if we had dirty ears we would be told 'you could grow spuds in those'.

My friend's mum said (and still says) to her: "you couldn't stop a pig in a passage" meaning "you've got bandy legs"!!

How about if you break a leg don't come running to me?

I love the richness and resonance of these sayings.

My wonderfully straight laced in other ways mother always does a lovely twinkle for 'It's amazing the fun you can have without laughing'. My norwegian husband has picked up sayings from me and the mind boggles about what happens at Swedish-French-English-Danish meetings as the dictionaries come out to translate my husband's offers that 'It's as broad as it's long'.

If you should ever need a definite guide, Nigel Rees: As They Say In Our House, includes explanations as well. A nice toilet book.

Bron, I used to play that Muppet Album all the time when I was a kid, never knew what on earth the Hesperus was, until now!

We use 'The wreck of the Hesperus', too, and 'Haggis McBaggis'. Not sure which one I am today, lol!

On a busy day I like 'I'll meet myself coming back'. Another of grandpa's favourites when I asked where he was going was 'There and back to see how far it is.'

SueDonim, "Haggis McBaggis" LOL. As a southern child, I remember giggling myself silly when my godmother, originally from Fife, came out with this fab saying. I'd never heard anything like it at six.
My mother's sayings were unfortunately almost all profane to the extent that I can't post most of them here without liberal use of asterisks. She occasionally referred to us as limbs of Satan, and would groan, "Jesus, Mary, come to my aid" if we were being naughty.
She now clucks in an outraged fashion at the terrible language in films and on TV.

"You're not made of sugar - you won't melt "(again about getting wet, and yes I know technically it sould be dissolve).
"You make a better door than a window" - again I can't see through you.
"Were you born in a barn?" - shut the door
"Would you like to do something for me?" - meaning do it - which was usually the response I got when I told my mum no.
"It's like Newcastle central in here" - meaning too many people all getting in each others way, or just loads of people passing through - I presume it referred to the train station.

and moving on tho the more annoyed...
" If I S* snowballs in summer you still wouldn't be satisfied"

Being and exiled Geordie, it's been so long since I heard the one about the wet kipper.

alison222 - I'm going to use your last one on dh. He'll probably turn round and tell the kids that 'mummy's premenstrual again'. But it'll be funny to see the expression on his face. ROFL thinking about it.

The worst is when you find yourself using those expressions that you swore you wouldn't!

I have found myself saying to my daughter 'do you want a smack?' and 'this place is a pig-sty' amoung others that I can't recall now