Can someone please give me some advise on getting my child to wind down on a night.

[Meganlillymai]

My little girls 18months she's a very hyper and clever little girl. I've been on my own for nearly a year with her as me and my oartner split but lately she's been such hard work. She has been in a bedtime routine since she was 7 months bed between 7-8 every night. Tonight she's exhausted as she's teethin as am I tired from being up all night. So I out her to bed but past few nights she's had this ear pricing scream. I feel terrible leaving her to cry but I don't want to keep on going into the room. Any advise I feel awful and like I'm failing.

Please dont feel like your failing, moat children do this at some point and it is difficult, i felt exactly the same as you about leaving them to cry but what i did was, bedtime routine as normal then into cot (usually screaming and kicking) then say goodnight and give a kiss really calmly and leave the room. Then you leave the room for 10 minutes, (i sat on the stairs almost crying myself and feeling awful but trust me its worth it) then if still crying after 10 minutes go in and say bed time and lay her back down and walk out again and wait another 10 mins then if still crying go in again but dont say anything. Continue this until asleep.
The first couple of nights were hard and it does sound like alot of faffing i know but it really does work! my DS loves going to bed now and it is so easy! Good luck and let me know how you get on x

My son is 11 now and is a little monkey for winding down but for different reasons now. I went through the same thing with him as you are now. I'd just returned to work and it was really hard but I did exactly what meganlillymai suggested. We eventually got past the issue with this technique. It does really work. Altho on one particular night I jumped out of bed and ended up breaking my toe on a blanket box. Now it seems like a comedy moment but it didn't at the time. once we got through these issues and he was a toddler sometimes when we both tired and over wrought I used to start the bed routine just half an hour earlier. Just remember that although its hard when they cry, it's all noise. don't beat yourself up, sounds like you are doing fab. Xx

Much empathy Meganlillymai. DS did the same, though a bit earlier (15 months). If it was teething, I gave him medicine at tea time, when it was really bad teething ( a handful of times). I also noticed that he would cry and scream if he wasn't quite tired out enough. So after tea time he has busy play then its winding down ( we watch for an eye or nose rub he does to know he's tired). Once he wasn't tired until 8.45pm - cue him whinging and screaming at us trying to put him to bed. He loves in the night garden and ELO music (don't ask me why). He might have a little dance on his own and then for the slower tunes I have a dance with him. After milk and biscuit we sit in story corner and read and as soon as I see the cue, he's off to bed. Also I discovered that when he got into the clingy phase, we gave him Iggle Piggle and now he nods off within minutes, no screaming and then we creep in and do the Iggle Piggle extraction.

Agree with other posters. Keep at it. Good luck.