Dummies at Nursery - Nursery Nurses - do you give them to all the DC?

[callmeovercautious]

DD is nearly 2, has been at a lovely Nursery for a year now. However about a month ago she started asking for "dummy". We tried giving her one when she was little so we do have them but she has never used one as such.

However she was throwing a tantrum and I handed one to her to see if that was really what she was asking for and she shut up and sucked it. Wanted to take it to bed and everything. Ever since she asks for one everynow and then - I have thrown them all out now.

In the mean time I have noticed that occasionally there is a dummy in her "box" at Nursery along with her other things. I had just thought it had been put back in the wrong place but now I am wondering if they have been using one at naptime with her.

Should I even bother asking? I am sure she is somehow having one there, perhaps she just steals it from one of the others

Any thoughts?

Hi callmeovercautious

By the sound of it your nursery are probably using a dummy for your daughter.

I have three children boy 15 years old, and two girls now 12 and 9. Both girls had dummies and this was my choice alone. Go ahead and ask if they are using dummy for your child as it is something you need to know for your own peace of mind.

Why have you thrown them all out? It's a phase they will grow out of just like breastfeeding or biting another child at nursery (which I read a lot of on the forum).

To be honest the nursery should let you know this from their daily records and if this is a comfort thing then you need to know.

By the way my 9 year old still hugs her teddy at night even though she is a well-adjusted 9 year old but I have given up worrying.

I'm a registered childminder and would not hesitate to recommend dummy/comfort item to any parent as I can see the benefits long-term.

We only gave the childs own dummy to the child if it is parents wishes.
We would never give a dummy to a child who doesnt have a dummy normally.

Thanks. Scarfmaker - I have nothing against them, as I said we tried DD on one but she would not take it when tiny - she found her thumb What bothers me is that they may be starting a new habit for her when she is nearly 2 years old. I threw them out as I thought we did not need them and they were newborn ones anyway so not great for her to play with as she now has a very large set of teeth to chew them with

Perhaps she does just steal them from others as they are novel to her IYSWIM?

My DS has never had a dummy - yet when our friends DD comes to stay he is always nicking hers and sucking it (although he still seems unsure as to what should happen). In his class at nursery there are some children that have one, but the staff would never even consider giving one to a child not known to have one. Strangely he never steals them there though.

Does your DDs best friend at nursery have a dummy perhaps?

My God, I would be livid if that happened at DS's nursery. Glad to hear it isn't done at yours nurseryvoice.

A 2 year old is at least 18 months too old for a dummy IMHO.

cmot - yes there are a few that have them and she is very sociable - likes doing what anyone else is. So I think that may be the answer. Today she was asking for one as she had seen a dolly in the argos catalogue with one! We were choosing Birthday presents

I may have over reacted, I think I will just mention she seems to have an interest in them and ask if they can keep an eye out for her pilfering Dummys from others. I would hate her to upset the other babies by stealing their comforters.

Thanks again everyone.

Could definitely be a case for wanting one because others have them. My son is currently insisting on wearing a dory hair clasp at nursery because everyone else (i.e. all the girls) have them. Nursery did check with me that it was okay though.

I would say it's because she's seen other children with them. The one on her box was probably one she acquired off another child.

I care for a baby who uses a dummy and the other children are always asking if they can have one.

I work in pre school, so 2yrs upwards, we don’t have dummies in the setting.
If they come in with one, it taken out and put in their bag.

My DD started asking for a dummy after seeing children at nursery with them. I think she thought they were for babies (she stopped using hers about 6mo so no memory of them) and then realised some children her age still had them and thought she was missing out. I just repeatedly told her that she didn't need one and she forgot about it in the end. Like you, nothing against them, but not going to start at 2!

I would speak to nursery. Not acceptable to give her a dummy to sleep without asking, it is a parents choice. And lots of people are really against them so they should really check!

Could it be that she's nicked one from someone else so one of the nursery workers thought it was hers?

I don't think op is still worrying about dummy use by her daughter seeing as this thread is 9 years old

You never know insancerre. It might have become a deeply ingrained habit