Baby DC going to nursery and I’m a mess!

[MummyJ36]

Hello

Just looking for a bit of advice / reassurance. My DC2 is due to start nursery for 3 full days in a few weeks. They are nearly 12 months old. We’ve done a few settling in sessions but they have been very short and I’ve joined for part of them. DC2 did their first hour alone last Friday and cried for half of it and cried when I left. They were pretty upset when I collected them too.

DC1 didn’t go until childcare until much later as I took some extended leave from work and by the time they went they were talking and felt less a baby and more of a young toddler. DC2 just feels like such a baby still and I’m starting to feel really emotional about leaving them. They feel so young and vulnerable.

Just wanted to get some feedback from anyone who has had a DC go to nursery for the first time at a similar age and how long it took for them to settle in and for you to feel happy sending them and not a total emotional mess!!! I was 100% sure I’d feel ok second time around but I actually feel worse!

I've settled two in at just over a year old. To be honest, it took something like 4 weeks for DD1 to fully settle, longer if you count the settling in sessions (the poor thing had to start nursery as we emerged from first lockdown, so it was quite the shock), but I'd say within the first 3 or 4 full days, I could see signs that she was comfortable enough to show her personality and that the staff were getting to know her as an individual – just little comments about what she liked, things she could do, stuff like that at pick up.

DD2 was easier – I'd say she was pretty settled and I felt confident she'd have a good day with a week or two (attending 3 days a week), but it still felt like I was missing a limb to be without her at first.

I sent both of mine for 2 days around that age. DS1 took a while to settle fully. I'd say 4-6 weeks in total but we did have a Christmas break in that time and a lot of bugs! Once he was settled, I was fine. DS2 was much easier. A week or two max but I was much more chilled out which definitely helped and we were mostly over the winter bugs when he started.

With my first it was a few months because she picked up every nursery bug going and I had to keep her off or go pick her up. Rough times. You do get through it though. She loved nursery in the end and was great socialising, going to school etc. My second hasn’t gone to nursery yet at 2.5 and I worry that it’s going to be harder for her to adjust as she’s older.