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I don't understand my sister

2 replies

rosydreams · 31/08/2026 14:57

Now i know the problem ,probably starts with me when my brain does not seem to work on the same wave length as other people but i do really try to be understanding

I don't understand my sister i love her dearly but she's just so confusing

we have had issues in the past but i have learnt a lot since then. She works her self to death she has no time for anyone but work .I try to get in contact with her to talk and she never rings me back .So i ring a bunch of times and leave a message not tons and shes gets very upset i am bothering her. I get to see her maybe once a year. As she is so distant i cant arrange family gatherings or holidays together. She says sure lets do that sometime and i try to arrange but then she gets upset i am bothering her.

She liked going to the shops together so once a year we would go see the shops .She would offer me so much i tried to turn it down. But as it was the only time we got to spend time together i couldn't really pass up. But she got upset as spending to much on me .I get that so i stopped asking to go on trips like that.

She decided to move from London to Scotland and said we never seen each other anyway .So now i never get to see her ,which is such a shame she's the only close family i have left .Our parents and other sister are dead i just wanted to be a part her life and i keep offering but shes so far away.

Its hard because now i am getting married i want her to be a part of it. And she told me she would love to help decorate. So i said well in a few weeks on this date i am going to see the venue. I ring her not answering ok fair enough i leave her a message but again when she rings back i get accused of bothering her and putting to much on her. She says she does not want to help plan decorating even though she said she would and i am back to the she says one thing but means another. I asked her to be a bridesmaid earlier when i asked about decorating which i have been talking to her about. But now its to much to ask of her.

Its bad enough being neurodivergent i have no friends no one to do things like shopping or planning with apart from my other half. But i dont even have a family member to be by myside .At least my other half sister is nice enough to share opinions and ideas. But its just so hard, i cant ask my sister anything regarding the wedding .Just let her be a guest and keep her at arms length

I understand its been hard for her as well but i just dont know what i should do

OP posts:
Overthebow · 01/09/2026 07:17

Are you diagnosed with ADHD or ASD? If so, it could be possible that she has it too. I’m diagnosed with both and something I struggle with is out of sight, out of mind and so keeping up family (none live close) is really hard for me and I’m not close with any of them.

rosydreams · 01/09/2026 09:00

I am on the waitlist for a diagnosis ,its just hard when you dont understand social ques or social rules .I wish she would communicate better me so i would understand .She knows i have a hard time with it ,i honestly dont know if she has issues either she always seem like the sane one.

She and my other sister where smart enough to get a free scholarship to private school. But she had a burnout breakdown recently so i know shes been to the doctor but i dont know anything else.

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