Netmums Sty-lee thread: Add your ticker here!

[morningpaper]

So let's chat and add our tickers. First person to say the word "arse" is disqualified.

How was your day?

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BABY NO 1 is FOUR YEARS and 245 days old
BABY NO 2 is 20 months and 12 days old

It has been 45 HOURS since I was last chased out of town with a PITCHFORK

I last OVULATED 3 days ago

It has been FOUR MONTHS since I last cleaned my Mooncup properly

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WWW i'm so offended that you would use such foul language.

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5 minutes since I ran out of ticker ideas

Hiya!!!!! Newbie here!!!! - any advice on using this site?!!!?

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I LUV BEING A MUM (shiny glitter writing)

It is 12 minutes since my last gin and tonic

It is 2 minutes until my next gin and tonic

lol at gif of fairy, this thread is making me laugh a lot

to all the people in Darfur from tickertastic.com

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40 MINUTES since I last used my inhaler

5 MONTHS since the condoms by the bed went past their sell-by date

20 MINUTES since I last looked in the mirror and blasphemed

"The Wheels on the Bus Go Round and Round!"

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Hiya RuddyNorah babes ((((HUGS))))

Your pics are so COOL and CUTE (((MWAHHH!)

condoms have a sell-by date?

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2 seconds till I bomb upstairs to check condoms

40 seconds till I scream at DH for his crass stupidity in not checking

2 minutes till I open a bottle of Pernod

AWwww thats so sweet Davina

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It has been 10 seconds since I ate chocolate

It will be 10 seconds until I look up weightwatchers

It will be 20 seconds til I have some more chocolate

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Hi Huns ((((((hugs))))))to you all

This is so much more pleasant that that horrid Mmsnt. Does anyone have a recipe for organic lentil mash?

Thanks huns XXXXXXXX
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10 hours since I polished my Crocs
3 hours since I last looked at the Lakeland catalogue

Miss Golightly, to use this site you need to make sure you're well and truly concussed, so throw yourself down the stairs with a Le Creuset pan on your head and you'll be one of us immediately, there's a dear.

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I WILL BE SCORING MY NEXT HIT FROM : that dodgy foreign bloke from down the hall

MY LATEST STI WAS : unfathomable, they've called in Dynorod and Rentokil, we're still none the wiser

Ooogsfrog, u r sooooo funny, hun (((((hugs for that)))))

2 hours since I last sobbed down the phone to my therapist

37 minutes since I went through the bin searching for still-lightable fag butts

28 minutes since I rescued an empty Sara Lee chocolate fudge cake wrapper from the recycling and licked it clean

17 minutes since I last sobbed down the phone to my therapist (again)

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lol

PMSL at this thread, especially WanderingTrolley's last post!

Goodness me it really IS very late and I should be in bed

((((((HUGS)))))) to Twiglett - congrats!

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175 HOURS spent on Mumsnet this week

23 HOURS since I last faked an orgasm

The 1805 from Paddington to Truro is running 34 minutes late

56 MINUTES until I next fake an orgasm

My favourite gunn is a SMITH & WESSON

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I don't have time to chat, but just wanted to come and hug you all.

Kissies

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It has been 4 years that I have not killed DD

It is 2 mins until the above is untrue
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"I'm lovin' it" Hun

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2 weeks since I last bought another buggy

28 days til I get paid

£8,000 on me storecards

3 seconds since I told someone to F off

SCOTTISH THISTLE Glittertastic.com

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2 minutes since I realised somebody is pretending to be me, I am Davina!
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14 minutes since I last went to the loo!
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29wks 5 days until I'm 35!
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8 hours until I next log on to Mumsnet!
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LOL - it really is like that LOOK!

Its been a while since I told you guys just how much I love ya!

Hugs and kisses.

This place is fabaroony

Just wanted to say that

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It has been 3 days since I last replaced the batteries in my vibrator.

SNOOOOOOORT OK let's keep this non-libellous ok PLEASE

Hi Guys! Look what my little pixie-twins and I made today!!!!

Wandering Trolley - Le Creuset is just lovely but it doesn't match my Eternal Beau accessorised kitchen/breakfast bar.

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My tiddly Pixie-Twins are 6 years, 6 months and 6 days.

It is 7 years, 7 months and 7 days since my guy gave me a good fucking seeing to.

I was going to watch The Apprentice, but have decided to sit in front of a mirror and simper at my own smugness instead.

INTERPOL HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR ME FOR 456 days

I TOLD MY LAST LIE TO THE BAILIFFS ON Wednesday, I think.

IT HAS BEEN 867 days 13hours 8minutes and 2 seconds since I BIT MY WAY THROUGH THE WALLS OF THE SANITORIUM

i am PMSL,thank you for this thread.

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BABY 1 is 9 years and mmmmmmmm old

BABY 2 is 8 yrs ;;;;;;;;old

BABY 3 is ???????? 3 old

BABY 4 is 17 months ~~~~old

BABY 5 is 10 weeks 5 days old

i last had a period 33 DAYS AGO

i last checked my coil 3 MINUTES AGO

1 minute 7 seconds since i last contemplated suicide

Morning Paper, "it has been SIX DAYS since I last masturbated" and "It has been SEVERAL WEEKS since I last BD's with my darling husband yet "23 HOURS since I last faked an orgasm "

Are you DancingTina?

15 months since my last secret pregnancy 
8 years since I last had a life 
32 hours since I last played with lego 

 

Am crying - STOP IT!!

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Baby no 1 is 8 yrs 2 months 3 days 22 hours old

Baby no 2 is 6 yrs 6 months 5 days 4 hours old

Baby no 3 is about 4

It is 6 hours since I snorted coke

My compost bin will be full in 2 weeks

I won £2.50 on Partypoker.com

I last ate lard 3 minutes ago

Hiya. Ooh I've had a glass of apple juice and feel a bit tipsy

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My Princess is 45 YEARS old

My Prince is 67 YEARS 5 MONTHS and 29 days old

7 YEARS since I opened my Ebay account

I've been breastfeeding junior for 67 YEARS 5 MONTHS and 30 DAYS tomorrow

648 DAYS since I consorted with a bearded man

5 DAYS 6 HOURS since I made myself sick with my own tweeness

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