Netmums Sty-lee thread: Add your ticker here!

[morningpaper]

So let's chat and add our tickers. First person to say the word "arse" is disqualified.

How was your day?

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BABY NO 1 is FOUR YEARS and 245 days old
BABY NO 2 is 20 months and 12 days old

It has been 45 HOURS since I was last chased out of town with a PITCHFORK

I last OVULATED 3 days ago

It has been FOUR MONTHS since I last cleaned my Mooncup properly

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my ticker

ROFL
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BABY NO 1 is 3 weeks 5 days 23 hours and 40 minutes

It has been FAR TOO LONG since I last changed a nappy
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Oooh...if you scroll down about 4 post on the NM's coffee house thread posted by JellyBelly, there is a post from AliG (right) and if you look at her ticker, there's a half decent bloke on it!!

I quite fancy George!

Maybe tickers aren't sooooo bad after all!

he's only 17 behave

i am so this thread is still going.it gives me something to live for.

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day 34 of 28 day cycle

3 HOURS since i last did a PREGNANCY TEST

2 HOURS 55 MINUTES since i screamed 'yipee!!'in a public convenience.

my period will arrive TOMORROW or it will be

3 DAYS untill i get arrested for killing an old granny who queue jumps in tesco.

'if you're going to kill yourself,you might as well enjoy it'

I can't quite believe they have such incredibly prominent pictures of their dcs. I know some people have them here, but they don't have a big flashing chart with their D.O.B and the size nappy they wear, ffs.

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Nasty Bitchy Wife to the Prince with the enormous schlong

Mama to peachipoo-snuggle-huns, born 3/5/06, NI number HR 44 56 47 D

i sud have this hung around my neck lol

I went on that site once out of interest.... fled screaming! How can anyone really be that fluffy?

how enormous is this schlong

sorry that wasnt a very net mums thing to say

ah who cares i wanna know

Sixofone, I'm shocked. shocked I tell you!

WelshjellyBelly, erm well it scared the pants off me on our wedding night, shall we leave it there?

no thats made me even more intrigued

do you hire him out for throw the hoop games

where are your tickers,ladies?((((hugs)))))
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OMG!!! So sorry hun ((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))

xxxxx

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7 days since I jumped on a ticker bandwagon.

3 hours since I last saw a new good cause ribbon I could add to my ticker

30 minutes since I last photoshopped my average child into a new soft-focus, love heart surrounded montage

that didnt work
_

This thread may be a llittle mean but has really made me laugh...

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187 days until my little angel arrives

3 years 279 days since I married my SOULMATE (little hearts ticker)

yellow ribbon plus sarah's law ticker

Holy c'moly I've been taking the michael for a couple of days and just visited for the first time

I am now that none of my made-up tickers can be anywhere near as barftastic as the real mccoy

The Best of Me revolving pictures of fat ug'y baby in various outfits

The chuckly-wuckly is 6 months, 2 days and 4 hours old

1 Hour and 22 minutes since my last bowel movement.

40 minutes until my first beer.

WelshjellyBelly, you are a naughty girl. I shall give him entirely the wrong idea if i mention ring toss...

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Cutesey Wootsey Wifey Bifey of the 9 inch Mammoth man my true wub

Next baby due in 10 yrs 3 months and 6 days

LMAO DS has just come in asking what I'm cackling at.

4 minutes since I last stroked dd's hair

2.5 hours since I last ate

10 months since I got divorced

9 months since I last worked (have been at college btw, not lazing about!)

3 years and 11 months since dd was a one day old baby in my arms

And too long since I last had sex

Oh huns daahhling, so nice to see you again ((((hugs)))) you were so helpful when you my dh

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bunny kittten is 5yrs, 11 months, 4days and 52 mins old

cuddly boy is 4 years, 6 months 15 days and 13 mins old

2 DAYS since bunny kitten 1 wet the bed (pink sparkly fireworks)

^^32 MINS since cat brought in petrified frog^^

:::::31 MINS since dh rudely woken by screaming wife:::::

30 MINS since frog (and cat) removed and peace regined

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Good morning all you lovely ladies. (((hugs for everyone)) Well it's half seven and I've already done the washing, ironing, made the beds, hoovered the house from top to bottom, deloused the cat, wormed the dog and cleaned out the rabbit hutch. phew! Think I need a cuppa! Hope you're all feeling fluffy and sparkly and happy - TGIF!

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It's been - one week since you looked at me, cocked your head to the side and said 'I'm angry'

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Morning all. I had a delightful night's sleep. It's so wonderful to have a baby play chopsticks on your ribs all night. And DHs snoring is like fairy panpipes in my ears...

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4 minutes 31 seconds since my boobies last leaked

3 mins 47 secs since my last cup of tea

3 mins 30 secs since used booby leakage for cup of tea as out of milk

I have put on 340lbs of baby weight

4 weeks, 27 days and 20 seconds since I last watered my plants

2 hours and 31 seconds since my last credit card refusal