Weird accidents that are strangely hilarious

[SnakeyMcBadass]

I got up to check on the DC last night and tip toed across the squeaky landing. Returning to the bedroom, I somehow managed to walk/bump into the lever door handle. The door handle threaded itself down the side of my pants, stopping any forward motion of said pants. My arse, however, was still in motion. I was still on tip toe, managed to get a front bum wedgie, and tip forwards. I put my hands out to stop my fall, and DH woke up to find me doing a weird half handstand while attached to the door and muttering 'Fuck, fuck, fuck'. He pissed himself laughing rather than helping to free me, the bastard. I have a cracking bruise on my hip and a carpet burn on my elbow, but the pants are still intact. I am quite impressed by the engineering, tbh. Anyone else hung themselves upside down from a door?

A few weeks back we had some little chicks in a large cardboard box. Dd2 (1.5) decided to pick up on of the chicks and lent into the box- which was almost as tall as she is, promptly fell head first into the box! All I heard was a little shout and turned to see two tiny little legs popping out the top of the box! She was heartbroken and I really had to hold the laughter in as I picked the sawdust out of her hair!

Resurrecting this little gem that's had me laughing over several nights.

I have a wide legged trouser story. Newly started in my first job wearing new long wide legged trousers and metal tipped heeled boots. I'm walking down the stairs talking to my boss when I catch the heel of the shoe in the trouser turn up and catapult myself down the last dozen or so stairs. Boss pisses himself but helps me up, bruised my knees pretty badly but no blood and I have to walk around the rest of the day with a huge rip in my trouser leg. Because it's the main set of stairs by reception the receptionist sees and has to report it as a health and safety accident, blaming the stairs rather than my attire. Next week there are workmen in gaffer taping yellow and black striped tape onto the edge of each and every step. Of course everyone asks the receptionist why they're doing it and she re tells the story multiple times, name checking me every time it would seem. Becoming notorious in the company in my first few weeks was not something I imagined in my first job!

I am reading this in my hospital bed. I broke my arm tenpin bowling. Have just had it surgically pinned back together.

When I was a teenager my then boyfriend was round at mine and I was making hot dogs for our dinner. I put the hot dog buns on our plates and set the plates on the table and then went to check on the sausages. then boyfriend thought it would be hilarious to pop his own "sausage" into one of the buns not realising the plates had been warming in the oven! I pissed myself laughing as he shrieked in pain. He was a wanker so always enjoy remembering this story!

Another time me and a friend had just driven to a house party and were all glammed up and dressed to impress. As we walked to the front door my friend put her foot down a small open drain and her shoe got wedged in place. It took me ages to help her get free as I was falling about laughing!

When I was little I used to ride my aunts horse most weekends. It was a huge Irish cob and I must have been 7-8. One day my aunt decided I didn't need to be on lead rope, so she took her bike out on a hack. That was the day the horse decided to get spooked by a house alarm going off and bolted down a country lane.the saddle slipped and I was clinging on upside down under the horse. I eventually stopped opposite a family having a picnic, who just looked at me . I was stuck there until my aunt came peddling round the corner several long minutes later.

When I was about 14 I went on holiday with a friend and her parents. We had taken the dogs for a walk on the beach and climbed back up the path to the cliff top car park and little cafe. (up north somewhere - Bridlington way) friends mum, friend and I were at the cafe buying '99s and her dad was at the bottom of the little hill where the picnic tables were, with his new digital camera taking pics, Cue me with '99 in hand.. somehow I fell off the first step and summersaulted/rolled/flew down this hill. my friend collapsed laughing, her mum was laughing and panicking and her dad caught it all on camera.. much to my shame! I got up, unscathed, and carried on eating my '99 that also didn't have so much as a blade of grass on it. 17 years later it still makes us all piss! and they still have the photos!

This thread is just the gift that keeps on giving

A couple of years ago I was in the work canteen wearing my new lovely Ugg boots. Got the Friday special of sausages, chips and beans and sauntered off through the canteen to meet my friends.
Unfortunately, I neglected to see the 'wet floor' sign, Ugg boots went sliding, I did the splits while simultaneously flinging the tray carrying the messy dinner at top speed onto my chest/neck/face, with the result that I was completely dripping in baked beans.
Everyone in the canteen was like before absolutely creasing up laughing.

I left the job (and the country incidentally) not too much later.

Just read through this whole thread. Crying. "John, John!", weebling pillowcase & dead mouse finger especially!

My own happened a little while ago. I seem to have developed a habit of rocking myself backwards slightly before getting out of a chair, to sort of give myself momentum to stand up iyswim. Normally this is fine, but on this particular occasion I was having a picnic with some friends on the side of a grassy hill. I decided to stand up for some reason, and just automatically did my usual rocking-back-for-momentum motion, which of course sent me into a roly-poly down the hill.

Smashing thread!
Have enough crying laughing for hours.

Mine was a few years ago taboggoning in France. Friend pushed my down the hill towards the end but I managed to steer myself out the gate down another icy hill and straight out into a road.
A car was passing at the perfect time and I careered face first into the passage door.
Bust nose and my face shape in the man's door. Don't remember much after that

Oh and another canteen one, a horrible colleague of mine slipped on a huge chip on the canteen floor, smack bang on her arse amid loud screeching and jumped up, threw her water bottle and the laughing crowd and ran off crying. She was 37 at the time