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Original poster

ExH has child benefit & I want it back

32 replies

RainbowDashstolemyidentity · 04/09/2016 23:41

1 year after I left exh (6 years ago) I hadn't received any maintenance so contacted csa. They awarded me maintenance based on 3 DC's living with me 4 days pw & him 3. He wasn't happy & made a claim for the child benefit for all 3 kids, after a 6m investigation they gave him the child benefit for middle child.
This meant he no longer had to pay maintenance for middle child.
Child benefit office told me that I couldn't appeal this unless there was a change in circumstances.
ExH has recently moved in with his gf would this count as a change in circumstances?
It's v hard making ends meet as I obviously still support all 3 kids but only get money for 2.
Anybody have any similar experiences with child benefit?

OP posts:
pontificationcentral · 04/09/2016 23:48

So he has them 3 days, you have them 4. He gets cb for one child, you get cb for 2. You get cm for 2, he (essentially) keeps his cm for 1. It's probably about even, isn't it? When you take into account that he has them 3/7 of the time?

Original poster
RainbowDashstolemyidentity · 04/09/2016 23:52

I should add that he earns considerably more than I do (6/7 times as much) child benefit knew this but still awarded him DS2's money.
I just want to know if there's any point appealing the decision now he's living with someone (now has a joint household income) or shall I just leave well alone!?

OP posts:
IceMaiden73 · 05/09/2016 04:01

I think it sounds pretty even too

pontificationcentral · 05/09/2016 04:15

Well, he is required to inform them of his change in relationship circumstances as he is a child benefit recipient. I'm not sure if that change actually makes any difference to financial arrangements though. I imagine it would just change any benefit entitlement he and his new partner are claiming (for example if any of them claim benefits as a single person). Not sure it will affect you. And it isn't really you that should inform them, it's him...

MephistoMarley · 05/09/2016 05:19

Surely if he and his partner earn over £80k combined he won't be entitled to it any longer?
The type of change of circumstances they mean though is him having the kids less often.

Original poster
RainbowDashstolemyidentity · 05/09/2016 08:15

It doesn't feel even, he is a high earner & I work p/t. He agreed that he would buy Ds2 clothes,shoes,school uniform,pay for clubs etc all he buys is a very cheap school uniform nothing else.
There's no way he would inform them of a change of circumstance if he thought that it would be detrimental to him!

OP posts:
neonrainbow · 05/09/2016 08:20

Work more hours then if you want more money. You only have them one day a week more than him.

JacquettaWoodville · 05/09/2016 08:21

What Mephisto said. He will have to repay through his tax code if either he or GF earn over the limit (it's not a joint income limit though).

If this is the case, better that it goes back to you than is lost altogether but he's unlikely to do this if it means he then changes the court ruling on CM.

JacquettaWoodville · 05/09/2016 09:55

"Well, he is required to inform them of his change in relationship circumstances as he is a child benefit recipient"

I'm not sure this is true if CB is the only benefit. It's fine to claim CB and repay via taxes if required - I would suggest this anyway as things may change during a tax year eg job loss

Original poster
RainbowDashstolemyidentity · 05/09/2016 12:48

There's no way that he would willingly let them know if he thought it was going to mean that he'd lose it!

OP posts:
JacquettaWoodville · 05/09/2016 13:20

Here is the rule over child benefit - only if his GF has an income over £60k would he have to repay it in a tax code:

www.citizensadvice.org.uk/tax/how-to-pay-income-tax/child-benefit-and-tax-if-you-have-a-high-income/

I assume he has a lower income than £60k or he wouldn't have sought the CB in the first place via the court.

Him moving in with his GF wouldn't mean he had to pay maintenance for a different number of children, though - I suspect the change in circumstances would be if he had the kids fewer nights (is this happening?) or if he needs to support any other children (does she have kids?)

19lottie82 · 06/09/2016 06:45

You can put in a counter claim for the child benefit, it's relatively simple. You just need to provide a supporting statement and evidence that the child lives with you, ie letters from school / doctors.

IzzyIsBusy · 06/09/2016 06:55

Are you claiming child tax credits and working tax credits OP?

The amount he is claiming for is around £35 per month is it that much of a difference to your budget as you are claiming for the other 2?

Original poster
RainbowDashstolemyidentity · 06/09/2016 07:08

I know that I can put a counter claim in but unless there is a change of circumstances they won't even look at it
Izzy - it's not the £35pm if the fact that because he gets the CB he doesn't have to pay cm for that child, which equates to a few hundred pounds a month!!!

OP posts:
LyraMortalia · 06/09/2016 07:10

Your arrangement sounds fair, a court thinks it's fair, if you want more money you need to work more. Your care is shared why should his working, earning girlfriend effectively pay for your dc? And you say you support all three kids (half the time only more or less)) and only get 'paid' for two. He supports all three kids (half the time give or take) and only gets cb for one which you'd like taken away from him because he has a gf. Stop focussing on him and start being responsible for you.

AyeAmarok · 06/09/2016 07:13

Surely if he's earning 6/7 times your salary he's (now, it didn't exist 6 years ago) over the CB threshold of 60k?

IzzyIsBusy · 06/09/2016 08:17

Izzy - it's not the £35pm if the fact that because he gets the CB he doesn't have to pay cm for that child, which equates to a few hundred pounds a month!!!

But he pays cm for the other 2 yes?
You are nearly 50-50. You are claiming benefits plus cm for 2 children and all he is claiming is cb for 1 and no cm from you.

Sorry but i think this is fair. If he is earning over tbe cb allowence then they will make him pay it back.
If you need more money can you not do more hours or get a better paid job?

JacquettaWoodville · 06/09/2016 08:24

I agree with Izzy; I think this is fair.

Aye, anyone earning over the threshold can still receive CB, they just have to pay it back in tax. Assuming that he does this, net-net, this parent/child set would get more money if the mum got all three sets of CB but as she has noted, she wants the third CB in order to get the third CM payment and why would the ex give it up in that circumstance?

Op, would you consider waiving a claim to a third set of CM if you got the third CB transferred back? You'd then be a bit better off.

TheNaze73 · 06/09/2016 08:27

Sorry OP, I'm not seeing the problem here, seems like the CM split is in your favour.

IzzyIsBusy · 06/09/2016 08:29

I am 50-50 and i claim the cb and wtc. I dont take cm off the ex as we have shared care and he does not claim cb as he earns a bit more than me so it balances out.

Fourormore · 06/09/2016 08:33

I think it would only be taken as a change in circumstances for the purposes of reevaluation if the girlfriend's income was over the £50-60k threshold. I assume your ex is under the threshold.

thebakerwithboobs · 06/09/2016 08:46

It sounds fair to me too. As others have said he can't be that high an earner if he can claim CB (so I'm not sure how the maintenance for one child would be several hundred as you think it would be-isn't it a certain percentage of earnings for second and third children? I don't know) I'm afraid I agree with the previous poster that if you want more money, you'll need to work more. I have read so many posts from single parents who have ex partners or ex husbands who don't/won't bother with their children at all who I am sure would give their right arm for your arrangements.

Original poster
RainbowDashstolemyidentity · 06/09/2016 11:27

Thanks for your posts
I am in a catch 22 position where I would love to earn/work more but it will directly affect the element of housing benefit that I receive, in order to make it "worth my while" I would need to work more hours than I have available as I pick DC's up from school 4 days pw.
I understand what you are all saying about ExH and it being "fair" it just doesn't feel fair when i and the kids when they're with me are going without.

OP posts:
IzzyIsBusy · 06/09/2016 11:42

Are you relly going without?

Without what?
Food clothes heat?

neonrainbow · 06/09/2016 11:44

It sounds like you're jealous that he had a better standard of living than you do. Thats tough. He's not there to subsidise your choices.

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