"Why were you off?" "Oh I had swine flu......"

[Thandeka]

Got first day back tommorrow after MMC a week and half ago. Am doing a phased return so going to build up to full days over next few weeks and see how I get on- am quite scared about going back. Trouble is I am a teacher and kids (and staff) are fecking nosey. I am so so tempted to say I had swine flu when they ask! Trouble is I know they will believe me! Cue major pandemic panic at London secondary school in all the papers. Ah well it would amuse me no end!

What do you think? Shall I do it anyway.........?

(Sorry if somewhat lighthearted nature of this post upsets anyone- that honestly isn't my intention- the way I deal with my own trauma is through humour)

Go on - do it!!

Sorry about your mmc. xx

Just say you had a virus and do a big snort!

Sorry also about mmc, but it's great that you're able to have a giggle!

haha, love it You could just say you've been on a little trip to mexico ;)

And don't worry about offending! It's nice to see more light hearted posts

sorry about your mmc

Go for it! I wish I could be there to see their faces!

Aha my plan deepens. Ultimate behaviour management tool. "I had swine flu and if you don't behave and get on with your work I am going to sneeze on you!"
Muahahahahahahah!

I really am so tempted- the only thing stopping me is the fact I know stupid kids would tell stupid parents who would complain and then the real reason would have to come out. Then again what do I care- have decided am quitting anyhow so in fact lets bring on the major news coverage of the swine flu outbreak brought on as a result of insensitive nosey children.

Back today. Is surreal and hell. Head is very stressed about swine flu! Looks like schools are having to update protocols etc. Anyhow under no circumstances am I to say I had swine flu....

(Awww shucks!)