Advice please on 7/8 wk anembryonic MC blighted ovum

[EchoesOfLeon]

As detailed above I'm having a MC and would like some hopefully positive stories about going through the natural MC method.

Had a MC at 13w earlier this yr after the baby was diagnosed with a fatal foetal abnormality. I had an ERPC a few days later and didn't have any bleeding before.

This pregnancy I had a scan at 7w exactly that showed an 18mm empty sac so anembryonic pregnancy was diagnosed (scan scheduled for one week later to confirm).

That scan is tomorrow and the plan was to schedule ERPC for early next week as soon as the clinic is able to do it. However I've started bleeding today and I'm thinking that the miscarriage will probably happen naturally before next week.

I'm hosting Christmas and for various reasons REALLY REALLY don't want my family to know about this MC.

Does anyone have any positive stories about managing a MC ok at home? The sac is small for 7 weeks and no embryo present so am I being daft by hoping for something like a very heavy period??

I've stocked up on painkillers and maxi towels and we have an ensuite so I can have privacy. Do you think saying I've got a dodgy stomach would cut it as an excuse??

Sorry this is so long and I know I don't sound emotional about it but it's been a long year and I just knew this pregnancy wasn't right from the start so I've done my grieving

Really sorry to hear about your loss. I had a natural loss at 7 weeks and it was like a long and heavy and at times period. No more painful than usual really (but I do have painful periods). From a physical point of view nothing would have been obvious. However I was distressed and emotional. Hope it goes as well as it can and ((hugs))

Thanks, think I will be ok emotionally hopefully. I could cope ok with a heavy period type experience but most things I've read online make it sound much more worse than that.

I know everyone's experience is different but I've had no pregnancy symptoms at all and haven't felt pregnant once the whole way through so hoping that this means an 'easier' MC.

Sorry that you have been through this too

Oh Echo I'm so so sorry this is happening. Do you absolutely have to host Christmas?

I'm in a similar position right now so have been doing a lot of reading, and from what I can figure out is that even though the sac might be small, because it's still in there the placenta might have kept growing so the blood loss will still be pretty full on, not to mention the pain. Most women say it feels more like labour pains than period pains, and for a few hours.

Also, just because you're bleeding doesn't mean it will start any time soon. I've been lightly bleeding for 5 days now and keep getting cramps (and crossing fingers it will finally be over soon) and then...nothing.

Is there any way you can call off Christmas and say you have gastro? I'm guessing if you don't want family knowing what's going on then you're not overly close anyway so might be best to just spend the day with your DH watching some rubbish films if possible.

So sorry again

Thanks smells, it's sucks doesn't it??

No way to change Christmas plans now, and to be honest I do still want to host. Being busy takes my mind off things. I just don't want them to know what is happening.

If this takes days to kick in properly then that would actually be better for me because I can have an ERPC on Monday/Tuesday hopefully. Surgical is the best option for me but I'm just worried it will happen naturally before then because of the bleeding starting.

Thanks for replying, hope it goes ok for you (as OK as it can be)

Everyone is different really so unfortunately there's just no way to tell these things. Most stories I've read the actual miscarriage happens soon after the bleeding starts, I just seem to be really unlucky in having this light bleeding that's just going and going. I want to miscarry naturally though so am really frustrated that things are being so slow.

For what it's worth, I've put everything I hold for 2 weeks cause was sure it was going to happen. Am now just getting on with things as it's nice to have the distractions, so maybe pushing through is the best plan, especially seeing as you will be in your own home if it all does start Christmas Day.

Good luck, hopefully things hold off until you can have the op next week.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I miscarried at eight weeks in January and managed fine at home with LOTS of towels and some serious prescription painkillers and a lot of gin

You may get away with having something like a very heavy, uncomfortable period. It will be shit, and you may want to use the excuse you mentioned to make sure you can get away for some alone time when you need it. This bit is graphic so apologies in advance, but I knew when I passed the sac. I then had to deal with flushing it. After that, things got a lot easier physically and mentally. Just make sure you're going to be ok (as you can be) with doing that whilst hosting Christmas.

Sending you love and hoping this ends soon for you.

(There is an excellent thread on here about the practicalities of MC, I will bump it for you)

Oh goodness, you poor thing. I won't lie. When I miscarried naturally, it was very painful and I was totally unprepared. I think I had labour pains (never been in labour as 2 x csections). I needed to stay near a loo for several hours and then finally passed the sac the following day, which was like an urgent need for what felt like a poo, and then it was very easy and an instant relief. However, I then got the shakes and ended up on antibiotics with possible infection. I had my mil staying and I did find it intrusive, but I think xmas would be doable with good support from dp, BUT I would tell them what is going on.

I'm so sorry for your loss. Can you take anything to speed it up?
I've needed to wear 2 pairs of knickers and had bed mats on the bed for when things were at their worse.
I hope it passes quickly and without pain for you x