The big O and perimenopause

[Raindancer411]

Hi all. I am wondering if anyone else has been through or is going through the same. I don’t know when it changed but when I orgasm, I get up to it and then it feels like it either just disappears or is cut short and just finishs as soon as it starts. Am I going crazy?

i have has 2 kids and am now 45. I am finding it frustrating.

I had (and sometimes still have) the exact same thing. But it has improved now I am fully in menopause. I remember googling it when it first happened but couldn’t find anything conclusive.

The drop in oestrogen has this effect unfortunately. The positive side is that the drop in oestrogen massively reduces the desire to accept male bullshit, which is remarkably freeing.

Pity you can't retain the O but still get the reduction in BS tolerance.

HRT and vaginal oestrogen have helped me enormously. I have friends who have also had very positive results from testosterone. Talk to a GP or, even better, a menopause nurse.

Oh. Interesting. I've always enjoyed sex but with newish BF, the first since my periods became irregular, I always have an orgasm, but it's not what I remember orgasms to be. Maybe he's not useless afterall 😆

They haven't disappeared, but they're definitely not as strong.

There is hope then! Thanks for sharing

Thank you all for replying. It’s really frustrating me

Vaginal estrogen cream has been amazing for me

Highly recommend; use internally & externally across all vulval tissues and clitoris x

Try either of the following:

• Hitachi wand.
• One of those pulsed air clit vibes, like the Satisfyer Pro.

I had this. I am on HRT including topical oestrogen and testosterone and although I don't know which of them helped, the problem is resolved. Sorry OP, it is really distressing to have sexual side effects, right up there with the flushes for me.

Love the observation that the drop in oestrogen leads to an decrease in tolerance for male BS!!!

The answer is local estriol cream. This is often needed and recommended for all peri- or menopausal women even if they choose not to have systemic HRT. The reason why is a condition called GSM. It can lead to thinning and atrophy of our genitalia and – guess what – nobody bloody talks about it.

Applied both internally, and around the external parts of the vagina, including clitoris. (Yes, even that can atrophy without it!)

Answer, I repeat, can be vaginal oestrogen cream which is easily sourced from the doctor.

Thank you all. I will see if I can make an appointment and see if they will prescribe me a cream.

Even if they refuse to, which ime is very unlikely, you can buy it over the counter in Boots/superdrug etc

How’s your pelvic floor? This can significantly weaken orgasms.

@DidimumI don’t think it’s an issue as I haven’t seen any other signs of it but will start working on it

Nothing has resolved this issue for me. Im on systemic HRT including testosterone and 2 types of topical estrogen.

Sorry to hear this, how long have you been using the estrogen cream, has it made a difference at all, could you increase the dose

Are you on testosterone too?

also worth assessing stress levels, and fitness, cardio fitness and weight training?