Please tell me your embarrassing menopause stories.

[KhakiOrca]

I am 54 and always thought ' there's no way I'm gonna let a natural life cycle affect me' well...for that last few weeks I have been waking up sweating, literally soaked in sweat. I need a fan on to prevent this now (poor DP has to put up with fan noise)
Last week I lost my keys while out shopping ( never done this before) I was flustered and having hot flushes and stood by my car that I couldn't get in to to have a cigarette, forgot the filters so it was disgusting and I threw it on the floor...one of those jobs worth people come and fined me 150 quid. ( thought he was a security guard telling me he found my keys, but no ...

Went to a well known supermarket yesterday what i had been to before and happily weed in before... but this time I walked in and was hit by the stench of piss, I then saw three things that I worked out were mens urinals! I QUICKLY walked out and found the toilet with the skirt rather than the trousers thank gawd. Another problem is urgency.

And now today, went to a regular place for my daughters birthday, I go in to the right toilets and no water is coming out of the tap, so my hands are full of soap, I tell the manager there's no water coming from the tap in women's toilets., she goes and checks it out, she then comes over to me and says ' do you realise the water tap needs to be pressed '
Seriously, tell me it doesn't get worse!

Addressing my family by the wrong name is a big one for me . The dog is called by DGD’s name & vice versa & my DH is very patient at answering to a variety of exs , relatives & TV characters names ( called him Theo last night )
Losing my phone & keys ten times a day then flying into a mad panic and getting annoyed that no one is reacting ……
Menopausal anxiety is awful, I had counselling which helped massively . I do understand throwing the cigarette butt whist not thinking but don’t think the appeal will go anywhere . Councils are really cracking down on this atm. Wish they’d do the same with the dog shit !

Keeping track of where objects are, once I've picked them up, is challenging. House keys yes are a particular problem. I spent a good hour, busting for a wee, driving to everywhere I'd been that day looking for mine. I eventually found them loose under a bag in my boot, with no memory of putting them there. Can you still get those keyrings that chirp when you whistle?

I started a new job and was working in a magnificent old house with fabulous ornate furniture. My periods were down to once every 2 months but quite heavy. On my very first day, I rose from a beautiful light blue velvet chair after a meeting and there was a BIG patch of blood on it! The woman and two men I was with were so very kind about it and sent me home to sort myself out. As I left, the chair was in a skip on the driveway! Im still there years later.

This! The times I have picked my keys up and then got side-tracked by something else, and then can’t bloody find where I just put the keys down! I can spend 15 minutes ransacking the place looking for them before I usually find them in my pocket or under my handbag. Key rings that chirp would be amazing!

Before I started on hrt I had this too. Very forgetful.

Unfortunately I can’t go on HRT due to health issues, so have to just make sure that the diet is tip-top, daily exercise and all the usual well-being protocol, but I do worry that I’m missing out on that protective element that HRT brings.

I'm already on hrt!

But, I also have a mother with dementia and a father with limited mobility, and I live in a country (the UK) with awful health and social care provision. I suspect that that particular set of circumstances has more to do with my forgetfulness than whatever is going on with my oestrogen.

Revisiting this thread makes me realise that for some women menopause is a massive reduction in the sense of humour.

You can try supplements sage etc. didn’t do much for me though. Sadly.

BettyButterBum Oh god, poor you, that must have been awful! I can't understand though why they'd throw a lovely chair out when they could just get it cleaned?! More money than sense obviously!

Talk about missing the point

Got off it.
Today they sent me an email that said
apologies for the delayed response. I can confirm that we have accepted your appeal on medical grounds and the fixed penalty notice has now been cancelled, therefore no further action will be taken

Please understand that sometimes people are real.

Last Saturday I spent £4 k on a sofa that couldn't fit in my living room...
Yes I measured, infact I measured the space so many times, my dd asked if I was okay. 🫣

Literally don't know how I did it.

The worst thing is I'm losing all confidence in myself and feel really stupid regularly.

Well done.

I’ve had the rage, 0-100 in 6 seconds, anything could set me off. The worst was a full blown meltdown at work but luckily I work with some lovely ladies, they waited for me to calm down and then gave me tea and chocolate.
The brain fog is awful, I kept putting things in the fridge, opening docs at work only to wonder why, forgetting peoples names.
I started HRT and it really is helping. Maybe time to see a doctor OP?

Hi ladies im postmenapausal im 64 im all over yhe place... stuggling to wright this lol
Im on holiday in turkey just now and just started hrt patch cant lie on sunbeds sot on chairs whole body sore itching and soooo tired cause i cant sleep..... and my front teeth feel out
Hope this gets bettet🥲

Oww anx meeting new people and cant remember there names just trying to hold this together menapause more like mental pause!!!!!😂

For anyone who loses things regularly these days I really recommend AirTags. I have one on both sets of car keys and my phone case too. And my bag. I also use my Apple Watch instead of my phone an awful lot now as it’s harder to misplace as on my wrist 😂.

I also recommend reducing caffeine down, I’m caffeine and alcohol free and seem to have much more energy than my friends who aren’t.

one day last week I was having quite a lot of bother with irritation down below. I thought it was due to menopause but turns out I had just put my pants on inside out 🤦‍♀️ (which I suppose was also due to menopause)

After using supermarket self checkouts for years, I once forgot how to pay with my card - instead of tapping the payment machine, I kept trying to scan my card. The assistant had to come over and help me 🙈

This is exactly something I would do!😆 DS who is 12 has to help me with things like scanning shopping nowadays!

Oh I just got a parking ticket this weekend… maybe I’ll claim to be menopausal (true) and an arsehole (not true) and they’ll let me off…

Well theres no harm in trying. Do you have a revent hormonal blood test?😁

Well back from turkey.... and just had my 3 rd grandchild a wèe boy and he just beautiful was scared to hold him as im still all over the place lol forgetting names forgetting were i put things the lot!!!!!hope the hrt kicks in soon 🤞hope use are coping and good to know its not just me. Chin up ladies We Will GET THERE

I never had the baby lol daughter in law did 🤣🤣