Post menopausal intimacy

[StartingAgainAt50]

Have n/c for this & thought I'd post here rather than in the sex topic as there seem to be a lot of blokes hanging out there.

I'm 51 & post-menopausal. I have not had a sexual relationship for over a decade.

I've recently met someone & am frankly terrified! I'm worried about discomfort, bleeding, etc.

My last smear was incredibly painful & I assume I have some vaginal atrophy.

I started vagifem over a week ago, and hopefully that should start to work soon.

Of course I will be insisting on condoms & use plenty lubricant.

Are there any further suggestions/advice you could give me about being more comfortable?

I would say don't expect to manage PIV sex straight away. Focus on other things and get comfortable. I'm in a similar situation and it has taken a while but things are coming together slowly. It's a long game. Don't be disheartened if things don't work immediately. Vagifem is a good call. It's not a race. Hope you enjoy yourself.

Thanks - I've done a bit of reading and there was something about vaginal shortening/narrowing in women who have not had vaginal childbirth and/or a regular sex live - such as me!

Had seen comments about using vaginal dilators.

I have a decent sex drive & don't seem to have difficulty with lubrication - it's just the worry about penetrative sex.

What about trying a vibrator ?

Similar past history here too but my sex drive and lubrication were an issue, so hopefully things will be more straightforward for you. I looked at dilators but in the end didn't need them. A vibrator for penetrative is a good suggestion.

Ok, I have an old one kicking around & will give it a try.

Or any recommendations for a more comfortable one?