Realistically, what are my chances? Don't want to fall pregnant

[jamdonut]

I'm 53., and after a few years of horrible periods, and then erratic ones, I haven't had a period since October. I'm really hoping that they've finished now. I'm starting a new relationship , after my marriage was suddenly over at the beginning of November, but I'm wondering how 'careful' I need to be. I'd like to not have to use contraception , but I just know my luck!
What are my chances?

it's really up to you. There is always someone going to end up in the Guiness book of Records. The rule is you are still possibly fertile for 12 months after your last period, after the age of 50 or for 2 years under 50. I think the oldest natural conception was 59.

If this is a new man you have met since you split up with your DH just over a month ago, you need to use condoms as protection anyway because STIs like HPV, warts and other nasties are not always obvious. It's not presmubaly a long term relationship as yet and you don't know his medical history. If you do and he's been tested especially for HPV which causes cervical cancer, apologies.

I was ttc @45 and gp told me I had no hope in hell of having another dc.

Your GP was an idiot then. Cherie Blair's clearly told her the same :)

So without derailing the thread, shall I have another shot at 46??

What have you got to lose?figrolls

I think if you deffo don't want pregnancy a belts and braces approach would be best until you know for sure you can't. jamdonut

My great grandmother was 53 when she had her last baby....it was her twelfth.

I'm 47 and still have very regular periods. I have been with my dh for five years, we both have grown up children & have not used any contraception for the past four and a half years. I think you'll be ok!

That's a very irresponsible thing to say half!

DH's former gf had a sibling who was conceived at 49 and had various handicaps.

Medical advice is 1 year after age 50.

Just because you aren't conceiving doesn't mean another woman won't!

Fertility is based on two people. A subfertile woman could get pregnant with a super fertile man. And vice versa. It's a combined fertility issue.

Your partner could have slow or minimal sperm. You could be subfertile. You could be conceiving but no implantation...all sorts of scenarios.

What I mean is contraception from 1 year after the final period if you are over 50 when you have your last period.

The fact that a couple don't conceive in their early 40s, is possibly down to subfertility. Men's sperm can vary in quality and they'd never know . It's possible half that as a couple, you and your now DH may not have conceived anyway in your 20s or 30s.

But at 42 many women are trying for their 2nd or 3rd child. It's far too young to play Russian Roulette unless another baby is welcome.

Hmmm.. This is what I thought..
I just want it all over and done with now. I've had such horrible, floody , painful periods it is such a relief to not be having them.

I just know if I tempt providence , it will happen to me!

Not being judgy- purely advice- but if this is a very new man who you have met since you split up in Nov, you will know nothing of his sexual history (only what he chooses to tell you) and you ought to use condoms anyway. You'd be very silly not to. Men can carry HPV that causes cervical cancer, but it can't be seen. Take care of yourself.

PollyPerky

Not judgy at all ...good advice!.
He is someone I've known of for a while...A widower of several years. As I was married for 27 years, we're both a bit out of the loop. It's all very chaste up to now, but both ready to move forward!
Thank you for reminding me of what is quite obviously important.

figrolls my gp told me at 40 I was peri-menopausal and the chances of me ever conceiving were virtually nil.....I gave birth aged 41....she is a happy healthy 5 year old