I feel like a crap mum - give me some support :(

[SingleMum01]

My DS (7) has been getting increasingly cheeky and rude the last couple of weeks. I've been telling him that its not acceptable etc. Anyway today (after spending the afternoon with his dad, where he usually comes back a bit OTT) he was rude and I shouted at him it was unacceptable and he had to have a timeout. I don't shout very often and I can count on one hand the number of timeouts I've used. Anyway, as he sat on the timeout he said he needed the toilet. I thought he was just trying to get out of the timeout so I told him he could wait. He then wet himself and I feel awful. He does have a tendency to leave going to the toilet to the last moment but I hadn't seen any 'dancing' signs prior to the timeout. If I really had thought he needed to go I of course would have let him go.

Since then he has returned to his loving self - I'm sure I was right to give him a timeout to show I mean business, but I feel awful that I didn't let him go to the toilet

bump

Well he's back to his loving self as you say, so he must be feeling ok.

Well, if he stay put even when he was about to have an accident , I imagine he has a lot of respect for your opinion.

It is good that he is back to his loving self but talk to him about what happen, if possible... mention that it was not your intention for him to wet himself but that you thought he was making it up, apologise if you find the right moment.

I had a similar accident with my mother when I was a child, she didn't even acknowledged I had wet myself, it was sooo humiliating, I still flinch when I remember, even when it's been more than 30 years since then.

I have talked to him about it Mongolia and said I thought he was making it up and then I apologised, just feel so awful

It will be ok, now forgive yourself, both of you have learned important lessons today