Feeling lonely as a single mum, and now the holidays end.

[FancyDreamer]

Name change for this thread.

I am so sad of feeling lonely. I hate that the summer holidays are ending.

I am a single mum of two, I don’t have a coparent so it’s just me and the kids at home after work/school etc.

My colleagues are just that. We meet outside of work for Christmas every year but other than that it’s a leave work at work situation. No one is really friendly. Plus due to health reasons I can only work in the office one morning a week, the rest I do from home.

I am close with my family, but everyone has their own lives, same with my friends really as we’ve got older and had children we just don’t get together as much as we used to. I am however, the only person in my friend group that is single.

So seven days a week, 52 weeks a year, for the last 6 years, 99% I’ve just been alone in the evenings. Sleeping alone. Waking up alone. I’ve tried to date but ended up really having my heart broken in the most horrible circumstances.

I know I’m not the only one, and I know it’s not the end of the world but sometimes I would just like company.

Most days I am ok with it, but some days I just sit here in the silence and think there’s only so many hobbies and distractions I can have. Sometimes I just really want a cuddle. A real safe “I’m here for you” cuddle.

Mumsnet is great for anonymity but in this case, I’d love to give you that hug and be your friend.

how can we help you not feel so sad?! Xx

aww :( this sounds really tough. I felt a little bit like that before i met my guy online. he is now my husband and we are very happy. it doesnt mean its the answer for everyone. if not dating maybe try to get out for a hobby if you can manage this. a class, an activity, anything for some company and a little boost in your life. endorphins from an activity might help. how lovely though that you seem really close to your kids, this is lovely.

Thank you, I think I just needed to get it out. Every time I say it out loud to someone they just meet it with “get out more, start dating” and I just can’t do that again. After one abusive marriage that took 3 rounds of court, both divorce and family, and then the next person who I thought was safe to hurt me the way they did, I’m not sure when I’ll be ready to date again. I just need someone to just be here for me a bit, I’m always the person that’s there for everyone and yet I feel so lonely.

But thank you, so much, I appreciate your virtual hug more than you know.

I have a million hobbies, I’m always doing something but nothing fills that void in the evenings, of just coming home and the kids scurry off to bed and then it’s just me. I’ve been so comfortable in my own company for a long time, years in fact, and it’s not bothered me until the last few months. I don’t know what’s changed if I’m honest.

This sounds like me when I reached the point of all of a sudden wanting to meet someone and I later did. I hope you find what you’re looking for. It’s tough. Sometimes kids reach an age where they don’t need you as much as they used to or you have more space and time for something new. Best wishes

It’s no fun actually being with someone sometimes though… I spend all day on my own with our newborn and toddler and then when my partner comes home from work he spends an ungodly amount of time in the bathroom, will have expectations of dinner being made, I then bath the DC and do the bedtime debacle and when it’s all over partner is either out at the pub or snoring his head off on the sofa.

id love some “mum” friends, the kind you can just turn up in your pjs with hair looking like you’ve been dragged through a hedge but you have wine and that makes it all better!

I love my children, I really do but it can be very lonely xx

Can we start an online support group? Single mum to two young lads (18 and 21). Been single mum for over 10 years. Tried online dating but all I get is the weird ones or the guys who just want sex.
So if anyone wants a moan I'm here.
Hugs to you all x