Son leaving today

[Shoegal0305]

Not sure if this is the correct section to post in but I am a lone parent!

I'm lying in bed dreading getting up today. My 18 year old is heading back to the town he work in, 100 miles away. He has a job in the hospitality industry which obviously has been affected by Covid so he's been home since December. His contract starts end of this month but he is desperate to get back as his friends and girlfriend are there, obviously he will form a new bubble there with his housemates and girlfriend.

He was there for about 3 months last year, he quit college, caused me a lot of worry but basically I realised he was doing what made him happy. So since then he's passed his driving test and bought a little car which obviously I'm worried sick about, today I am travelling down with him and getting the train back, it's about a 2 hour motorway drive. I just feeling a bit numb, last night he packed his bedroom up there's not much left. I'm feeling so sick and anxious. Not much support in real life so looking for some advice on how to cope??

Be supportive and enjoy the trip for him.
Get yourself some nice treats and maybe a good book/magazine for the journey back.

If he's going to spread his wings you've raised him well. He sounds independent. Which is fab.

Then when home have a cry if needed. It's a tough time with lockdown and not having lots of support around. Is there anyone you can call tonight for a chat?

@Bopahula thank you, yes my friend is calling tonight. Doesn't help the landing is full of all his belongings waiting to be packed up. I am super proud of him but there's just been me and him since he was 3. I worry anyway but now add in a car too!! He's sensible but still worry!

I think this morning will be emotional. Seeing all the things to be packed. Knowing it's going into his car to his next step. Be kind to yourself. Accept you will worry, but him being sensible may help a tiny bit.
It will be an adjustment for you again, it's that bittersweet moment of proud warring against the emptiness of the house. You sound like you've raise a cracking son.
Sending 💐.

Single parent here. I have had a little mum-sob when mine have flown the nest.

It’s a big moment.

@Bopahula @Darker thank you.

He's left before but this time feels different. He went on the train last time obviously without all his belongings such as PC, pictures off the wall, etc. He's living with two really nice lads in a nice house, doing what he loves, but I still feel so bereft. He's been so miserable here, sleeping all day, he's so desperate to get back so that makes me feel better thinking how happy he will feel. It's just....... I don't 😂

I know I have this to come. You are in my thoughts. Well done in raising a fine young man.

Hopefully restrictions will change soon and you can visit.

@unicornsarereal72 thank you. When I have gone to visit in the past, I have stayed in some beautiful lodges with hot tubs, they're quite expensive but worth it. I'm already planning ahead as I have a week off in April! Covid allowing obviously! They are only 10 min drive from where my son stays so I get to chill out and he can visit when he likes. Need to get some overtime in now haha!

He is working at a big theme park, you can probably guess it? So we've agreed that if it doesn't open up and he's unable to start earning he will come home. Which selfishly I want but sensibly I don't as I don't want to see him upset.

That's him
Safely there I'm
On the train home now feeling really emotional 😞

Big hugs. What are your plan for this evening and tomorrow?

Hello @Shoegal0305 - do you like music? A few of us are on the 80s (60s to 00s really) music threads in chat. It is so fun and a great distraction.

Just think positive. He's happy & its what he wants to do. Imagine how you would feel if it wasn't what he wanted, you'd be saying I just want him to be happy. Its still hard though

Thanks all ..... @NeedToKnow101 how do I find the music thread? X

I tagged you OP so it will go to your email.. Here's a link too (I think!)

🎵 80's (or thereabouts) song thread 23 🎵

Not a single dm but dh isn't ds's df so doesn't quite understand - but my ds joined the army last year and went back after Xmas. He caught Covid last month hundreds of miles away. Today I emptied his room as his younger sibling has claimed it!! Felt like I was behaving like I was glad he was gone! He is 19 and rings and tells me he loves me daily!! Bet your ds misses you too op!

@NeedToKnow101 thank you I've marked my place on the music thread! X

@Santaiscovidfree bless you it's so hard isn't it? Hope your son is feeling better? ❤️

Luckily he had no symptoms at all. At least I can relax a bit and not worry quite as much.

I feel your sadness. I've raised my son on my own since he was born and he's now 14. I'm dreading the day but also know it's completely normal and desirable. Don't have any advice, just wanted to say hello and send you hugs.

@Santaiscovidfree good to hear about your son but I'm sure it was really stressful! @tartantroosers share your story with us when you go thru it it helps.

Just had a sporadic hour making soup. Then sat and stared at the floor for 20 minutes!! Need to kick myself but lost all motivation. Feeling very low today 😞😞

You are allowed to. Have a wallow. Then get busy. Is there some decorating or spring cleaning you could tackle.

@unicornsarereal72 yes loads I just can't motivate myself. Had a cry in the supermarket 🙄🙄 as was only buying for myself and I found it hard seeing all the little treats I used to buy for him. It really feels like a bereavement and I feel stupid saying that! He's only 2 hours away!! 😞

💚

My dpets keep me busy and sane (ish).. Do you have time /situation to have one? Dc joke every time a dc leaves home I get a ddog!!

We are a 4 ddog household so maybe some truth to this theory..

@Santaiscovidfree I had two cats, they were my babies long before DS came along. Sadly I lost them at 17 and 19 years old 😞😞. Miss them so much but I work full time now so often out the house for 13 plus hours so it's not fair on an animal 😞😞