Tips for writing a letter to P!

7 replies

MummyJules · 20/02/2006 00:16

As some of you may know - I am leaving my partner, unknown to him in the next couple of weeks. I am planning on leaving a letter to explain everything and wondered if anyone had any tips? I want him to understand why I have done this so want it to be sincere...
I think it will be the hardest thing I have ever written and I'm dreading it!

OP posts:

VeniVidiVickiQV · 20/02/2006 00:29

I dont know your situation - so sorry if this seems an inappropriate question but..... why cant you sit down and tell him face to face?

Original poster

MummyJules · 20/02/2006 00:36

Thats fine Veni!
I just know he would not handle it well and I think he would either try to stop me from leaving or kick me out there and then and stop me from taking DD. He has a problem with his temper and I just think its easier all round if I do it this way especially for DD as I don't want her to witness it.

OP posts:

Original poster

MummyJules · 20/02/2006 11:07

Bump!

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jco · 20/02/2006 16:03

Mummyjules, when you write your letter to him i would just try and be as honest with him as possible. write down the reasons you have for leaving and also why you felt you had to do it behind his back instead of sitting down and talking to him. If you intend to let him have contact with dd write this down in the letter so that he knows you aren't going to stop him seeing her. Thats all you can really do hun, just be open and honest

When you do leave make sure you take any important documents such as birth certificate and passports and anything of sentimental value as you never know if he will let you go back to collet them at a later date.

I don't know if you have thought about this but when you do leave you need to contact people such as water, gas, phone, council, electric, bank to let them know you are no longer there this will mean that you will not be held responsible for any bills he runs up the future. its very important that you do this because when i left my ex i was still held responsible for the huge phone bills he ran up because they still had me down as living there. He refused to pay it and i ended up with a ccj against my name even though i had done nothing wrong!

best wishes hun, believe me once you have done it you will feel so much better, like a weight has been lifted from your shoulders

Julie xxxx

Caligula · 20/02/2006 16:21

A basic rule of thumb is that if you're going to write a letter, make sure it's one you would be happy for a judge to read - because it might come to that.

Avoid using confrontational language or accusatory language ("you did x") stick to "I feel x".

Also, explain why you couldn't talk to him about it.

Kelly1978 · 20/02/2006 16:23

No advice, but I did that and I know how hard it is. I called my ex to tell him after I had left. Good luck with it.

almostanangel · 20/02/2006 18:35

hi hun hugs hope to talk later on msn took the first step today,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Flip