Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Legal matters

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have any legal concerns we suggest you consult a solicitor.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

My boyfriend got arrested last night and I don’t know what is happening

269 replies

Emz2019 · 25/03/2018 07:43

Me and my partner are expecting a child soon, he has children form a previous marriage and yesterday around 5pm he took them home, he stopped in the street and they got out and left but their mum came out and started shouting at him and he shouted back and she kicked the car and he drove off. He got home and was quite upset by this and left a voice mail for his solicitor. Next thing police are at my door and he’s under arrest for trying to run his ex over apparently. This was 6pm. I got a call from the police at the station at 7:30pm telling me that my partner wanted me to know he’s fine I asked when will he be home they said the early hours depending on how busy they get as Saturday nights are busy. I haven’t slept a wink it’s now almost 8am and I haven’t heard any more. I went onto find my iPhone and he’s still at the police station. However he doesn’t have his phone on him so I can’t contact him at all. I tired to call the police station but a voice message says they can not give out any info regarding anyone in custody. I’m going out of my mind now and don’t know what I can do to find out what is happening or when he will be home or even if he’s possibly been remanded in custody. Can someone help me out please I don’t need this stress I’m heavily pregnant

OP posts:
Dancingmonkey87 · 25/03/2018 19:05

I agree you haven’t been told the truth.

shesalady · 25/03/2018 19:05

I'm sorry op. You must be very stressed. Thanks

Gazelda · 25/03/2018 19:08

Is there anyone you can go stay with? Or who can come to stay with you? I think you need to keep yourself occupied to help keep calm.
Your mind must be whirring, and whoever is feeding you the info from Facebook isn't necessarily helping your state of mind.

Dvg · 25/03/2018 19:11

.

Hotdoggity · 25/03/2018 19:20

Bit insensitive to placemark.

Might he have been threatening OP? Must have been big for the kids to get so anxious too.

Original poster
Emz2019 · 25/03/2018 19:23

No there isn’t anyone who can stay with me I am so stressed it’s unreal since yesterday morning Iv had 1 slice of toast and two cups of tea. I feel so down and wish I knew the outcome of what is happening. But if his ex says he did try to run them over, he says he didn’t... nobody ever got hurt, could he really be looking at prison?

OP posts:
JiltedJohnsJulie · 25/03/2018 19:26

You’ve keep saying OP that nobody got hurt. If he was your ex and your child was with you and he drove a car at the 2 of you, would the fact that he didn’t hit you with the car make it ok?

AnchorDownDeepBreath · 25/03/2018 19:31

You really need to eat; for the baby if not for you.

I'm concerned that there's no one who can be with you. Are you quite isolated, other than him? Is there anyone you could call to talk to, if getting to them on Sunday would be difficult? Don't worry about disturbing people's Saturdays - I wouldn't mind at all in the circumstances if you were my friend.

I really think you need some support at the moment. I have the feeling that there's a lot more to this than you know; for the police and CPS to act as they have.

Original poster
Emz2019 · 25/03/2018 19:32

But they are just allegations she has made I don’t know if they are true or not but if he truly drove full speed at her and their kids he would have hit them, the fact he didn’t tells me it didn’t happen. But I wasn’t there

OP posts:
Original poster
Emz2019 · 25/03/2018 19:33

Iv had family and friends on the phone for support but I’m alone with my dog

OP posts:
shesalady · 25/03/2018 19:43

Can you have a nice bath and watch a film?

mumofblueeyes · 25/03/2018 19:45

Thinking of you OP and hope you get some answers in the morning.

Original poster
Emz2019 · 25/03/2018 19:48

I really couldn’t concentrate on a film right now my head is mashed I feel so down

OP posts:
ZibbidooZibbidooZibbidoo · 25/03/2018 19:50

Go and see someone. Even for a few hours to take your mind off it or talk it over. Don’t sit on your own and fret.

DextroDependant · 25/03/2018 19:55

What an awful situation for you OP. I think there is definitely more to this than you know so far. I hope tomorrow brings some answers.

Original poster
Emz2019 · 25/03/2018 19:57

I live miles from anyone and it’s 8pm they all have children in bed for school and would be settling down with their partner watching tv and stufff I don’t want to be interrupting. But yah it’s awful sitting on my own

OP posts:
dekfiji · 25/03/2018 20:01

So she's a psychotic nightmare who apparently gets everyone in her family and street to lie for her and manipulates the kids into kicking his car and he can't tell you anything but called his lawyer the second he got home and ... yikes.

It's not looking good OP.

shesalady · 25/03/2018 20:02

It's perfectly possible that op has the real story. Enough people have made Hmmremarks now. Let's be supportive and see what tomorrow brings.

Iflyaway · 25/03/2018 20:02

I agree. You need to eat for you - to keep your strength up in this stressy time - and for the baby!

Please put you and your baby at nr. 1 now.

Nicknacky · 25/03/2018 20:05

If you have someone you can phone then phone them. They won’t care that it’s 8pm and will want to help you.

What are you going to do if it’s true?

Crispbutty · 25/03/2018 20:05

Realistically you aren’t going to know any more until tomorrow so the best thing to do is try and eat (the baby needs this!) maybe have a warm bath. Put a film on that you know and love and doesn’t take much concentration, and rest. You must be mentally and physically exhausted. You know where he is and he is safe and stressing isn’t going to make any difference.

It’s highly unlikely he will be remanded tomorrow no matter what he has done, as I know people who have been charged with much worse and they have never been remanded before a trial.

dekfiji · 25/03/2018 20:05

I swear I didn't mean my comment to sound cruel, I feel sympathetic to the OP.

NotSureThisIsWhatIWant · 25/03/2018 20:06

Hey, you need to drag support from wherever you can. Ring a good friend/family member , it is not that you are calling for a bit of chit chat, you are alone and need support, I’m sure that if they are busy they will find a way to call you back as soon as they are free. It is an emergency.

There is nothing you can do, you cannot take a decision about your relationship tonight so get off mumsnet if it is not helping and try to find comfort on the fact that: he has a no molestation order against her, she has been arrested before and, if he saying the truth there will be a mark in his car where she kicked it.

Original poster
Emz2019 · 25/03/2018 20:19

Thank you eveyone I’m lying in bed and hopefully tonight I sleep but I keep having visions of him being refused bail tomorrow and I know I’ll break down in the court as they lead him away. But as people have said they have know people to be charged with much worse and let on bail so I pray he gets bail tomorrow

OP posts:
ColourfulOrangex · 25/03/2018 20:57

I know it's hard OP but try and test, hopefully you will hear from him soon Thanks

Swipe left for the next trending thread