My boyfriend got arrested last night and I don’t know what is happening

[Emz2019]

Me and my partner are expecting a child soon, he has children form a previous marriage and yesterday around 5pm he took them home, he stopped in the street and they got out and left but their mum came out and started shouting at him and he shouted back and she kicked the car and he drove off. He got home and was quite upset by this and left a voice mail for his solicitor. Next thing police are at my door and he’s under arrest for trying to run his ex over apparently. This was 6pm. I got a call from the police at the station at 7:30pm telling me that my partner wanted me to know he’s fine I asked when will he be home they said the early hours depending on how busy they get as Saturday nights are busy. I haven’t slept a wink it’s now almost 8am and I haven’t heard any more. I went onto find my iPhone and he’s still at the police station. However he doesn’t have his phone on him so I can’t contact him at all. I tired to call the police station but a voice message says they can not give out any info regarding anyone in custody. I’m going out of my mind now and don’t know what I can do to find out what is happening or when he will be home or even if he’s possibly been remanded in custody. Can someone help me out please I don’t need this stress I’m heavily pregnant

I know it’s not true at all she also said he assaulted his 8 year old! to be fair though OP, you don’t know what happened as you weren’t there. Yiu only have his word for what took place.

It wouldn’t hurt to ask the Police for s disclosure under Clare’s Law and to think about what you are going to do if he is convicted.

What does 'mortal' mean in the context you've used it?

I am assuming she means mortally drunk as in very very drunk.

Urban dictionary says mortal = very very drunk

You don’t know he didn’t do it. I think you need to try be more objective although I know it will be hard. And social services will be involved now he has been charged with assaulting his child.

Glad he's home. Make sure he gathers all texts and emails from the crazy bitch. She's obviously fuming you're pregnant. Don't let her effect your baby and make sure you eat!

Glad he's home.

Right now there needs to be a solution created for the sake of all children involved - his and your unborn child's. Sounds like a lot of animosity and it'll become tit for tat and people risk getting seriously hurt if a resolution isn't sought.

My first suggestion would be drop off and pick up done by someone else (you?) or at a neutral place. (Somewhere public with non involved and bias parties around)

There's been an allegation of assault on a child, and dangerous behaviour towards the ex.
It's surely completely unrealistic to think that there'll be any child contact, other than at a supervised contact centre, until these matters have been dealt with by a court?

Op, he's only out on bail, I mean that's gently, they didn't dismiss it, he's going to trial. 💐

I agree, I don't think he can be permitted unfettered contact with a child he is charged with assaulting.

Op, he's only out on bail, I mean that's gently, they didn't dismiss it, he's going to trial

This. OP, the CPS will only proceed witha case that they feel is likely to receive a conviction because it has to be in the public's interest to do so, given it is public funds that pay for it. They would not have committed him to trial if it were merely "tit for tat", they must have evidence that suggests your DP is guilty in some way. They really must.

I get that this is hard for you, but you need to try and be objective about this, and not just see what you want to see. The PPs suggestion of a Clare's Law application was a good one, I would do this if I were in your position for my peace of mind.

he’s being charged with dangerous driving (his ex claims he tried to drive into her and her children) also assault on his child but all he did was take his arm

they must have evidence that suggests your DP is guilty in some way.

well 'taking an arm' I guess could qualify as assault ,and maybe there are bruises that match the OP's partner's hand . So I can see that there could be evidence of that .

I wonder what evidence there is for dangerous driving - witness accounts ,skid marks ?

We don't know of course but I wouldn't rush to the conclusion that going to trial always means that there is solid evidence .

I would try and keep calm until the trial. It may not even get to that point as the CPS will now gather everything they have to put their Prosecution case together.
The positives here are that already the ex has been caught lying regards him being drunk. It also helps that there is a very rare non mol on her on behalf of your partner. Do not contact her at this stage at all or he'll have broken bail. If she contacts you both or has her family or friends do so, log it and speak to the Police and his solicitor.
In regards his access to their shared children, I would imagine at this point the assault allegation on the 8 year old will change contact and he may not be permitted any at all. I would prepare for that and that social services may contact you both. With you being pregnant and an allegation of assault against a child hanging over him they may want to conduct an assessment. I don't want to upset you but it's a possibility and you may wish to speak to a family law solicitor to see where you stand.
With regards on going contact with his children, at this stage he needs to protect himself from any further abuse, either through his ex threatening him or the children being violent on their Mum's behalf. As you believe this incident is the latest in a long line of malicious behaviour, if, and hopefully nothing will, anything comes of this allegation, she strikes me as someone who will get nastier.
In that respect he may want to organise supervised contact in a designated centre. It's not great of course but they will organise hand overs, there is CCTV and he can use it to his advantage to prove he offers a stable environment with his children. It shows he has nothing to hide.
Can I ask if there is any formal arrangements for the children? It seems to me that if their mother is so intent on maliciousness as to ruin the relationship between the children and their dad, to the point where she encourages lies and violence against him, surely he is concerned enough to apply for custody?
You have to protect yourself and your baby. This woman is never going away and will continue to be a source of aggravation until their children are 16 at least. I would be speaking to as many experts as possible.

Any good news op?

ah just seen. Best of luck.

The part that glares out from all of this OP is that it happened in front of their children . I think you're going to need to get some legal advice regarding any issues with your own baby - it's highly likely that SS are going to be involved with you, and I think you need to start thinking of your baby before your BF. For him to be charged and going to court, the CPS feel they have a strong chance of winning. And that could massively impact you. It's all very well blaming his ex, but he's played a part in this too. Please get some advice as soon as you can.

Make sure he gathers all texts and emails from the crazy bitch. She's obviously fuming you're pregnant

Hi mh boyfriend got arrested in Friday afternoon I've not heard anything its now Sunday when will they let him home x

Hi Amyfoy56 - we would recommend beginning your own thread if you'd like some advice from other posters.