Writing a will as a lone parent and including child guardianship...

[mama2moo]

I am a single mother of 2 under 5yos. Their father is still a part of their life and sees them often.

I need to write a will and want my wishes in case anything happens included.

I am pretty sure that if I die when the children are young my ex would want to move them to America. Something he spoke of doing for a long time but he wont do it now because of the girls.

Can I put that I wouldnt want them living out of the UK? Would he have to sign to say he agrees?

Is this because you would want your dcs to have easy contact with your family? Who would you rather their guardian was, their father or another family member?

If their father became their sole parent, do you think it would be fair to restrict his choices about what was best for the family?

Your wishes would be noted but would not be the only deciding factor.

You can write anything you like in your will by the way.

My family are very close to my dd's. It would be to make sure that my children still kept the bond they have with my family now.

So, if he became sole parent my will wouldnt mean anything?

Thanks btw

The appointment of guardians would not take effect until the second death. So if you died, your ex would have the children (I am presuming he has parental rights and responsibilities, etc).

You can word the appointment of guardians to act alongside a surviving former spouse. However, any appointment is open to challenge, let you former spouse know about your wishes and the reasoning behind it. You can also give your executors and Trustees guidance as to how to deal with the assets held on trust for your children. A letter of guidance would help you

The way I'd normally do it in these circs is to put an expression of wishes into your will that your ex "encourages and facilitates regular direct and indirect contact between my children and their maternal extended family" or something to that effect.

If your family weren't happy about the children going to live in the States they'd have to make an application for a residence order under the Children Act 1989. They'd also first have to apply for permission to lodge the application, so one extra barrier as they're not the parents. The court would then have to decide what was in the children's best interests taking all factors into account, and bearing in mind the recommendation of a Cafcass officer.

I'm a will writer and have a paid for ad over on Small Business Classifieds btw.