Posting here I can only cope with positive advice, pregnant with 4th

[yesmynameisigglepiggle]

Just been for a smear test and to cut a long story short I am about 8 weeks pregnant. I already have 3 children under 6. I love being a Mum but have just got my life sorted. Can't afford another child, can't bear another pregnancy. Am so worried, DH and I jad drunken sex and I got the MAP but somehow it hasn't work, there could be something wrong, my head is a mess and I am training for te London Marathon. I feel sick and nauseous. Oh God.

you must be worried.

bumping for you...

I daren't say the 'a' word but have you considered it?

Hi igglepiggle. I know it's hard, but after 3, i find it gets easier. I have had 6 of the little anklebiters. We could never afford another one, and I could never bear another pregnancy, but they just happened, usually after drunken sex. You could still do the Marathon (if it's important and you have talked to your doctor).

you do not have to proceed with the pregnancy. but if you do wish to consider termination, time is of the essence if you are 8 weeks or so. i would suggest seeing doc again, and asking about independeing cousnellign

Hi, thanks guys. I have not even seen the doc yet, the nurse asked if I thought I could be preg and did a test, have got an appointment tomorrow. DH wants another baby, I don't. I am worried if I go ahead what will be wrong if I took the MAP. Thanks for your support x

I am in the same situation as you, well sort of. I am pregnant for the 4th time with 3 children under 5. My dh , however, didn't want anymore and has been very quiet about the pregnancy since I told him. I'm only 6 weeks+. I have know idea how I'm gonna cope but I sort of know I will. Life will be hard but I have determined to enjoy the children and my life as things could be alot worse. Give yourself time to get over the shock!

As for the effects of the MAP, my sil was in a similar situation and my niece is fine.

Congratulations! I hope it all works out.

Hi, sorry to hear that you are feeling so worried and sick, its the pits I know. Could you ask your doc to refer you and your dh for counselling so you could thrash out all the issues that are bothering you together? When I was 39 I fell pregnant with my 4th accidentally (was on pill, dh seriously ill, 3 others were nearly 7, 10 and nearly 12). Was devastated and felt sure I didn't want another baby, had been there and done that, life had moved on as you say. Now he's 4 and a half, and a joy. Wouldn't say its been easy exactly, but I found that I was more patient with him (prob cos I was older). Whatever you decide, good luck and can you let us know what you decide?

We have five (the 4th was twins) and once they are there it is absolutely fine. You will be fine with it. Also when they are older they so adore being part ofa big family. It's something you give them foe life.

Thankyou all. I just thought I would let you know Dh is thrilled about the baby and my instincts must be kicking in because I have come to terms with it. We have no money for a new car so I think foinding a 6 seater will be the biggest problem, apart from the pregancy ( I already feel exhausted and ratty!). I guess another baby will jst slot into family life and even things up a bit and they will have each other which is fab, Finger crossed everything is fine and I have requested an ealy scan so will se if that comes through. Phew!

Oh and I haven't told anyone and am going to carry on the training and do the marathon even if I walk it!!!!!

Congratulations! I have 5 (all boys!)

You will be fine.

Im another who p[regnant with 4th. DC1 is five

Our main problem is also the car. Like you I'm hoping I'll just find a way to carry on

So glad you are feeling better about it all. Just wanted to say I don't think you need worry about having taken MAP - if it doesn't work, it doesn't work and the baby will be fine (one of my best friends had a similar situation, didn't want another child so took MAP but it didn't work. Discussed it with her dr and long and short of it is her little boy is absolutely perfect).

Congratulations!

Re cars - have you looked at the fiat multipla - don't think they break the bank and you get six seats and a boot

Re the MAP - it will not have harmed the baby at all.

We found we had to change cars after 3! we found a honda shuttle, it is older but we love it and it fits the car seats wonderfully we had a scare a last week when i thought i was again, (5 days late!) but were okay. I am fine if we fall again, i think its the shock at the thought of how to cope, but we always do dont we, life always throws us challenges and we face them head on!!

hope it all gets sorted for you x

we have just had no.4 (2weeks ago) and bought a second-hand Galaxy, the old type for more space. It was a steal at £1250, have had it for 4 months now and it running absolutely fine. Could you get something older?

Thanks for the car advice, don't mind a banger as long as it is big enough!! Am sick and tired alreadt but it is amazing how I have got my head around this and now am really happy and excited and loking at maternity clothes he he!!

Sounds like you have got your head around it now which is lovely - congratulations! I have 3 under 6 and am due no 4 soon and am looking forward to completing our family. This definitely feels like the last one for me as I am an avid runner/triathlete and would like to get back into that aspect of my life as soon as I can! I do know people who have run marathons when pregnant but it does depend on what level of fitness you are to begin with as to whether you can continue. Otherwise, I am sure the organisers will let you defer a year given the circumstances? I know I would want to post a good time and prefer not to take any risks with the pregnancy from overdoing it. I have continued to run with each pregnancy into the third trimester but have definitely changed from running to jogging at conversational pace. A marathon at that pace would equate to a long time on your feet!

just to let you know I started bleeding yesterday with what looks like a period so guess I have lost the baby. Not been to docs yet though, not that they can do anything. DH and i were gutted- and ths has never happened to us before. Anyway we are going to start trying for another baby straight away, it has just confirmed in our heads we do want one, but it all seems such a long way away yet. Ah well.

Sorry to hear your sad news. But in a strange way, it has given you and your DH an indication what you really want which is great! Would it be worth focusing on the London Marathon so that you have a longer view of it all, just to pace yourself and also give your body time to adjust and get super fit? In addition, it may take the pressure off getting pregnant again quite so quickly if you are more relaxed about timing because of the marathon in April. I can only imagine how stressful it must be to feel you have to conceive again after losing a baby.

I am so sorry to hear that, i would say still go and see your gp, just to be sure, as i bleed with both my elder two, sorry to worry you, just sometimes its best to get checked out x will be thinking of you x