Please help me to get my 8yo to like my 1yo!

[D886]

I have 3 dcs - two girls and a boy - aged 8.5yo, 5yo and 1yo.

At the moment, my 8yo keeps getting angry at my 1yo. He is into everything and she can't stand it. She did a closed punch gesture at him this morning and nearly caught his fingers in the cupboard whilst closing it in temper this afternoon. There are no issues with my 5yo and the baby. My two girls he really get on very well.

My 8yo dd is 8 going on 15. I think she together brother is a baby sometimes. I wondered if anyone has any tips with how to warm my eldest daughter to my youngest child?

*Two girls get on very well

*She forgets her brother is a baby

.

Would she respond to being given very specific ‘grown up’ jobs that only she can do, and be rewarded for?

Gather baby’s washing
Bath him
Etc?

Maybe you need to have a chat with your 8yo to find out why she's resentful of her baby brother? If you know the specific reason then you've more to work with. For example, is she envious of the attention he gets? Does he still cry a lot during the night and it keeps her awake?

My middle child is a master wind up merchant. When he's feeling a bit left out he niggles at the other two. I think its a case of any attention is attention. Making one of the others scream, well there's nothing quite like that for getting my attention pronto.

I find to keep harmony, they all need little activities that they get undivided attention. It doesn't need to be (can't practically be) hours. DD and I read and I set her off doing little craft activities alongside me whilst I cook or do paperwork, DS2 and I are currently watching the Harry potter films and DS1 is building a train set, associated models and learning some basic cooking skills.

They don't need to be really close for a harmoneous house. They need to respect each others equal right to exist, be civil etc.