Has anyone successfully fundraised for IVF? Looking for practical advice, not donations

[GlamazonLondon]

I’m expecting this may attract some strong opinions, so just to be completely clear: I’m not asking anyone here for money, and I’m not looking for opinions on whether we should be pursuing IVF or donor eggs. I’m asking for practical advice from anyone who has actually fundraised for fertility treatment themselves.

We’ve been TTC for five years. We’ve had three rounds of IVF, three chemical pregnancies, seen specialists at Tommy’s for recurrent miscarriage, and tried pretty much every avenue we could think of. We’re now doing donor egg IVF in Spain and have been accepted onto a three-cycle Live Birth Guarantee Programme.

We’ve recently had to bite the bullet and publicly share our story and set up a GoFundMe because we simply can’t fund all of the next stage ourselves.

We’ve already tried:

• friends and family
• personal Facebook and Instagram
• WhatsApp
• fertility/infertility accounts and communities
• podcasts
• approaching fertility organisations

We’ve had a lovely response so far, but we’re still a long way from what we need.

So, for anyone who has successfully raised money for IVF/fertility treatment: what actually worked?

Did you find particular forums, Facebook groups, communities, podcasts, local media, businesses or other avenues that were receptive to this sort of fundraising?
Did you find that personal messages worked better than public posts? Did sharing updates or milestones make a difference? Was there anything you tried that unexpectedly worked—or was a complete waste of time?

I’m particularly interested in real experiences rather than generic fundraising advice.
And yes, I’ve read posts & I know the obvious Mumsnet response may be “Have you tried just paying for it?” 😂 We’ve tried that. We have an IVF-specific loan from Gaia, a bank loan, two credit cards, no savings left and a wardrobe increasingly depleted by things I’ve decided I absolutely don’t need and can sell on Vinted.

We’re not expecting anyone to fund our choices. We’re just trying to work out whether there are other avenues we’ve missed.
So if you’ve actually done this, I’d really appreciate hearing what worked for you.
And if this isn’t appropriate for the board, mods, please delete. Hope everyone is well.

I know this isn’t what you’ve asked for but I think you’ll likely struggle to get significant donations outside of friends and family. While I’d donate to someone I know if I’m honest it’d be much less likely to donate to a stranger.

From a potential donors point of view you need to consider - Why am I donating to you and not the many others struggling or unable to pay for ivf? What’s your usp? It sounds cynical maybe but if you’ve not got a ‘hook’ or engaged followers, I think you might need to consider alternative ways to fund it.

Many people see ivf as a choice or a luxury. I think a lot of people don’t really get it unless they’ve been through it and unfortunately don’t see it as healthcare in the same way as they might see other things.

How much do you need to raise?

Do you have a large following? (Or know anyone with a large following who might be willing to share?) Can either of you work any more hours? Do you have any skills you could capitalise on? What could you sell? I’d be much more likely to buy something that helps to raise money than to make a cash donation to a stranger, again, unless your story is really compelling which might get you more interest.

Could you link your story to infertility awareness week where there might be more of a ‘buzz’ around infertility?

If you feel fundraising is your only option I’d search on instagram for anyone who’s done that successfully and try to pick their brain. You’ll probably be able to follow their journey too and get tips.

Hopefully this is constructive. I’ve been through ivf and know none of it is easy but the cost can be a huge barrier to even getting started and having a chance. It feels extra unfair that it’s in the hope of something most people can have for free. It sucks and I hope you can figure a way through it all.