SHOCKING NEWS - Goldilocks NOT sorry.

[ahundredmines]

Goldilocks, 7 and three quarters, has confessed to MN News that she is in fact not sorry for breaking into the Three Bears Home.

In a shocking revelation made from her home Ontheoutskirtsofthewood, Miss Goldilocks said, 'I don't care what you think. I wanted the porridge. Why should I be sorry for that?'

Last Spring Goldilocks made a public apology for breaking into the home of The Three Bears and did 4 hours community service, learning how to glue chairs.

Mr and Mrs Bear have not been available for comment.

Goldilocks, looking stunning in a pale blue dress, has announced her intention to host a programme on Sky, provisionally titled, 'How Nice is Your Bed, and Will I Want to Sleep in it?'

In the programme Goldilocks will break into the homes of unsuspecting people, and bounce on all their beds.

'I think it's going to be very interesting, a real challenge' Goldilocks told us last night, 'I'm so excited to at last be putting my house-breaking skills to some use.'

In a deal, rumoured to be in the millions, Goldilocks has agreed to also taste porridge for the programme.

'I mean I'm not keen on burning my tongue' she told us, laughing her pretty tinkly laugh, 'but I will if the programme requires it.'

Go brave Goldilocks, say all of us here at MN News

So look out brave MNers, should you go for a bracing walk in the woods before breakfast, make sure that it's not YOUR bed being bounced on.

It's all very well, but Goldilocks should be given an ASBO imo.

A spokesperson for Sky said 'these rumours about the programme are totally unfounded. We are shocked that anyone would think that we would endorse illegal and immoral practices.'

I can't believe that I actually went to the effort of writing this. lol

I could have just bumped.

like this

And then like this.

.

**
REGISTERING MY UTTER DISGUST
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Excellent.

You'll be watching the programme then?