first thing i would do is clear our debt...its crippling us!
Then i would do the selfish bit first.....buy a house (our first house!!!) a new car EACH(and lessons for me), take the boys to Toys R us and tell them have whatever they want (always wanted to do that!), fill upthe fridge and freezer as well as cupboards because we have never had all 3 full at once, book a holiday, GET MARRIED!!!
THEN
Make sure all families mortgages were piad off or buy thema house and new cars if they wanted them (would never give them cash as some family members woud waste it on illegal sunstances )
Give lots to charity
and helpout friends anonymously ie find out which bank they are with and just go and put somemoney in their account if they are struggling