UGH! BLOCKED TOILET! Please help..................

[GossipMonger]

I thought it was my fault as I had put cotton wool in the loo by mistake and so the water filled the loo bowl and went down slowly.

As DH blamed me I thought I would go and have a little poke around with my hand and I managed to pull out some tissue from the ubend but then a felt a bit of poo. So I got a wire coathanger and poked a bit more and now it is worse and the loo is full of DISGUSTING-NESS (which I shall not describe!) but there is no way I can be the cause.........

So..........what do I do now? Am leaving it til tomorrow and the children are on strict instructions to not go near or flush and I will go to Homebase tomorrow but what is it and what should I do?

Am scared of poo all over the bathrooma and the smell might get worse and DH is not very happy as I made him poke around too!

depends how brave you are.
Brave plan - carrier bag on hand/arm (make sure it has NO HOLES IN!) and poke and push to remove, er, solids
have honestly had to do this once or twice and the thought of it is far far worse than actually doing it. wear marigolds as well for reinforcement...
less brave plan - chuck a bucket of water at speed in the loo
plan for wussies - go and get Jeyes Fluid (evil stuff) from B&Q or some such, and put it in there. That stuff pretty much unblocks mines.

Black bin liner tied over a loo brush and plunge for all your worth. tis miraculous.

ooh thanks for replying!!

Am sitting here in trepidation.

so, what you are saying is that even with a bowl of hideousness brown gunk I should get the loo brush and just plunge and plunge and plunge - even though the bowl is quite full?

Might get DH to do it.

GW- do I put the Jeyes stuff in a full bowl of nastiness?

i know I am harping on about the fullness of the bowl but am having nightmares about it overflowing!!

thanks so much everyone

welllllllll, you could always bale it out first

might sleep first - sort out tomorrow!

Now you see this is where having failed to get your home birth comes in handy. Get a sieve you are not too keen on or a bowl and scoop out as much crap as you can (and yes it is mostly crap - wear gloves - and then do the poop diving with the carrier bag routine.

It will not overflow unless completely blocked. Mostly it is a slow drain probably you may find it has reduced substantially overnight - but you do need to deal with it.

I quite like dealing with things like this - there is a certain satisfaction when the water flows clearly again.

The bowl wil not overflow as long as no one flushes it.

Bail it out, then get a big plunger and use that to plunge furiously.

If it does not clear you need to go to a hardware shop and buy a flexible tool likethis to go round the U bend and grab hold of the blockage and pull it back out.

Alternatively, bail the toilet out completely and take the tolet off the wall and get your arm in the pipe and pull the material it out by hand. It will not harm you. You will need to clean thoroughly afterwards though.

Did this recently, very satisfying result.

this is your baby

Put it down the toilet, create a seal, pump away. Blockage removed. Job done.

Not pleasant, but effective.

Let us know how you get on

Now am I the only one who was faintly aroused by ABetaDad's post?

oh thanks so much everyone.

will report back tomorrow.

whomovedmychocolate - that was not quite how DW felt when she saw and smelled me in RL.

ABetaDad - where do you live as I think I NEED you!

DH will not be keen on doing this though once he starts something he will see it through to the end!

A man that sorts things IS sexy imho so I do agree with Chocolate!

Actually it was the whole plunging thing

DH thinks I look v sexy in my boilersuit when I am stripping out the old pipes.

update

DH got up early and the bowl was still full of vile stuff

He did the carrier bag thing (he is very brave) and we could hear him plunging away which was most amusing!

He has cleared the bowl but we are now not allowed to poo in it!! (Glad we have a loo downstairs!)

Off to get some Jeyes fluid now which will hopefully clear the blockage.

Thanks all for your help. If no better later I will be back!

glad it worked (so far)

Well done DH. As per our house female emancipation seems to stop once the iccy, difficult, dangerous jobs appear.

Does it all flush OK and run freely? If so, you are OK.

Am afraid it does flush OK and run freely ABetaDad!

am now looking round for something else you can fix!

fantastic
(to both points)

I am pleased for you - honestly.

We have a loo that does this quite frequently - a plumber friend told us to buy a cheap mop and keep that to use as a big plunger - we did just that and it works every time

Mine did this a couple of times. Once this New Year after a party at which everyone ignored the "please do not use" sign.

I had to open a drain outside on new years morning and prod around with a bean pole in the end.

Hugely satisfying!

If you are feeling very brave, try bucket routine.

Not for the faint hearted. Get a bucket of water, flush, and when the water is at its lowest ebb, chuck in a bucket of water. Th force can clear the blockage.

Try a blockblaster. Blasts away tough blockages with no splashblack!