Decluttering one item a day thread number 18 – quickly stashing our clutter in charity shops now we can let people back inside our houses

[stealthninjamum]

Here we are again, still decluttering and still chatting and sometimes getting rid of some clutter.

This is a group of mumsnetters who aspire to live in a lovely clutterfree environment, usually scuppered by husbands, children, dogs and in my house ‘valuable’ bits of twig and stone or origami versions of aardvarks and komodo dragons.

We are slowly decluttering our houses, chatting and updating each other on our slow progress as we go. We only aim to get rid of one a day but often manage more. Newbies are welcome to join us.

Since the last thread charity shops reopened and things got closer to normal. I’ve now invited friends over for the end of June so have a month to get the house ‘guest ready’.

Previous thread here.
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/housekeeping/4183135-Decluttering-one-item-a-day-and-counting-down-til-the-opening-of-charity-shops-thread-number-17?pg=38

Stealth thank you. I think I'm having another internal hissy fit. I think it's my inner hoarder shouting to give up. I wont give up. I will have a large glass of wine later on instead. I have got think positive and this is a positive that things can just go now. In my volunteering shift at the charity shop I sort out what's sellable or not and I know what I would and wouldnt buy. Either my eyesight is going or its chances trying to con me. If I give it to charity at least someone has decided the really want to buy it. Anyway I'm still gutted that someone got a imaculate £35 Boden dress free because they qibbled over a 50p tshirt that when I think about it was 30% off as well so less than 40p. Ho hum. That's my inner hoarder voice! It didnt fit my dd and she was done with it so I will get over it.

What happens to all the PJ tops? I can never find a pair either! Or I find some bottoms and no top so chuck them.only for the top to show up. I had some lovely gap shark ones that would have fitted as a hand me down, but they too met this fate. I used to give all outgrown PJs to the hospital children's ward but they last time I offered they said they only take brand new ones. Possibly dur to covid

Tween I have recently finished a major extension. So much dust!

Cleaned up downstairs again today , did laundry etc and exploded at DH because he and kids had left everything lying around after my yesterday’s efforts and not cleaned up in the kitchen except done the dishwasher . I keep on asking , begging , nagging then shouting at them to all to clean up after themselves but it’s not happening there’s always stuff everywhere and none of them can wipe a counter , clean a sink etc . I can’t and wont be their maid especially with my bad health . I guess I have to be even more of a drill sergeant around here . It’s exhausting but I’ve tried everything else short of living alone . DH is going out tonight too for a work leaving thing and will go to the office tomorrow so I’ll have manage with the puppy and the stairs . Now in bed and just want to sleep.
. Luckily kids are older so more independent now . DD has had her shower already and is doing homework and puppy’s fed he will get another walk with DS later if it’s not too wet . We are waiting for him to come home then the kids will eat together etc .
Thinking we’ll need another dump trip this weekend on the way to a birthday party DD is going to . There’s much recycling and some trash , bags to clothing and rag bank , a few storage boxes that are going , a lamp and a few books at least . I will discus the old fan with DH . Maybe he’ll take it back to his moms instead .
I’ll fold the laundry tonight there are a few DD too small clothes that I washed first going out from it .

Tackled the pile of my paperwork that had built up on the dining table this evening. It wasn’t very big, but I’m pleased to get it down to two things (a birthday card to write and a reminder to renew my driving licence). The rest has either been filed, gone in the box of paperwork, or been shredded/ recycled.

I meant to take a bag of clothes to the charity bank near us today, as I saw it being emptied yesterday, but forgot. Will try to remember tomorrow.

No outs yesterday, a busy day in the end but did enquire about getting someone to clear out our gutters as noticed some lovely plants growing in there!! So not decluttering but a step towards getting the house more sorted, so perhaps I will count that!

Threw away a dummy if dds which was falling to bits.

That was my only out yesterday. I succumbed to a dodgy tummy on Monday night. So took the day yesterday to recover and relax. On the plus side I lost 1kg….

157 out since yesterday I kid you not. I'm just about to dash off to the charity shop and I have to go to the tip later on as I still haven't sorted out the boys draws.

After yesterday's vinted faff, I put 12 pairs if leggings in FB market place and the same old time wasting piss taker who doesnt have a car, but says yes to everything has just again, earmarked them. FFS!

One I had an enormous sweep of my dd clothes I will go back to listing bundles on 80% off fee days. I never sell the boys things as they never go. At least if I start again from having lots of room I wont have anything hanging about any more.

I was so cheered off yesterday and again wringing my hands this morning thinking i cany do this. But i start I'm off. I am almost ready to post a after pic. Not too long now and it really will look better

@IncessantNameChanger that is so frustrating isn’t it!!! I have a similar person who says yes to anything that I freecycle. I know from experience they never turn up to collect.

More general cleaning and laundry today . Didn’t do clean laundry folding yesterday was busy with other admin and then too tired but will try to get it done today .
DD old school uniform leaving the house latest on Friday we’re donating it to the school not selling . Also her old trainers ,school shoes and bags are going so that’s a bunch decluttered soon although will be replaced with stuff for new school . Uniform shop app is shortly .

Thank you Ellie as your post reminded me to do my driving license renewal as well.

Incessant 157 items is amazing! I am fed up with Vinted. I have listed a dress, it cost over £100 new and still has tags. Outfit for a now cancelled wedding. Someone just offered me £15! I'll probably regret saying no in a few weeks when I give up and take it to charity shop. Or is that the usual level of offer?

Also out, unwanted computer accessory to a friend.

Very slowly going through tubs of my mum's stuff. Several useful household items now unpacked and put with mine.

Declutter -
Seven pairs of spectacles in a bag, waiting for optician to start taking them again.

Name changer wow! 157!
One small out here but if I wasn't on this thread I would just think I'll declutter another time. One book gone, and a shelf dusted, couldn't believe how bad it waa

157 items is amazing, Incessant, well done!

No new decluttering today, but I took a carrier bag of clothes (previously counted) to the charity bank near us. Nice to get stuff out of the house!

I didnt make it to the tip but dh says he will go at the weekend. I finished therapy last week form my mums abuse in my childhood. it's the reason why I hoard. When I was about 19 or 20 I was driving from Kent to London to uni every day. After Uni I worked nights in a factory. When I got home from maybe a 20 hour day my mum would come to my room to tell mr how fat ugly and stupid I was. If my bedroom was full of crap she could only hurl verbal abuse from door and not thump me.

My hoard is my wall to keep me safe. It's my self abuse. it's my sself harm. It's a buzz when I visit a shop. Its everything a addict needs i guess. Never talked about it at length with anyone before.

And it's going. lots of tears today as i plod on. Its 1000 times worse as i dig in but - I'm fast getting to my goal of everything in draws and cupboards. Once the clothes are done, I'm no longer a hoarder. It's my emotional thing I cant part with. But after the therapy my armour has to go. I just see the wounds underneath and it makes me sad. I think it's like ripping off a plaster.

Yikes. Feels weird as I have started this many times but I can really see the end now. Just got to do it I guess and feel the pain. Plus my ds3 finishes school on Friday so then the cycle of descending into feral summer starts! But this time I will not buy anything at all. I have already bought his uniform 🙂 so please God no growing over summer!

Random paperwork can be the summer job I think.

Yesterday I put a bag of toiletries/cosmetics (very old and used) in the bin, and sent another bag to the hygiene bank with DH. Today I spotted on FB that a local children's charity wanted age 12 girls clothes, so a bag of DD1s stuff waiting in the hall to be dropped there. It's all beautiful and almost new but I've tried to sell it and nobody bit so now someone who has very little can benefit, which feels good.

There's another bag of clothes the wrong size, they can be dropped at the charity shop on the way and then found some more unwanted gifts for the hygiene bank.

Finally thinned out the DDs book case and taking anything too young into work (school) to donate to the library.

Didn't count but estimate 70 items. Its not 157 but a very good start!.

incesssant I'm so sorry to read about your mum's abuse. I think I had recognised you (I live nearish medway and had remembered your four dc). I hope that you are now no contact with your mum and realise that everything she said was a lie, she clearly had lots of problems and unfairly took them out on you. I think it's amazing that you've turned things round. Obviously you've been decluttering for years but in the last few weeks it really feels like you've progressed and done amazingly. Sending hugs.

I haven't yet done any decluttering as I had an outdoors coffee morning and I did home made lasagne for dd2 (using up a few sheets from my 3 boxes of ood lasagne). So before pickup I'm about to start in the room of doom with more paperwork. I am very demotivated about this at the moment so if someone can give me a virtual kick up the arse it would help.

Thanks Stealth. No I'm not NC but I have gone much more low contact. I'm a people pleaser so I feel too guilty. However I have work on my people pleasing too 😉

Medway is rather a unique place so I'm glad your just outside of there 😂 I moved over a county. It always feels like home when I go back but my God it's so rough. I think it always was but you dont see it when your there. Still I am very found of the place.

I had a small slow down and it was 33 out today. It's very interesting that say if you have 15 things hanging on the wardrobe door, and get rid of 30, you still have 15 things that dont fit into the wardrobe 🥴

Things in places was getting a bit "tunnel like' as I have coats on the wall by the door to squeeze past and than hooks over the bedroom doors upstairs. So that's tomorrows job. And finish the boys draws. That is like the tardis!

My sons disability SW is coming next Wednesday so things need to go back into their places after this weeks sorting.

It feels relentless. Stealth do you take before and after pictures? Choose one corner in the room of doom. Before, after, phone timer for 30 minutes and a picture of your outs. Then have a cup of tea and 30 minutes look at the three photos. You will be surprised when you see what cleared.

Thank you.

Used up three different pots of cake sprinkles today. And some icing sugar. Made a cake.

Am isolating now as colleague who I sit next to has tested positive and symptomatic. I’m waiting for the track and trace team to contact me to tell me I’m a direct contact and I have to legally isolate.

I haven’t left the house since Wednesday evening now. I’m going a bit mad.

Ooh pizza wheel broke so that got ditched too.

incessant ‘only’ 33? That’s still awesome. It must be motivating knowing it has to be away before Wednesday.

I don’t tend to take before and after photos even though I often suggest it to other people. Think it’s because it’s only in the last year I’ve had actual big projects, previously it was all a bit random with the odd project that I got bored with and never finished (Room ofDoom for example). I might take some photos. I really need to finish it next week before dd2 breaks up from school.

Just shredding today and admin. I also received two cheques from the two bank accounts I finally closed last week so I need to pay them in and then that’s a job finished. And I spent about an hour looking for my back door keys as I couldn’t put washing out without them. I didn’t find them but ended up putting loads of stuff away - although I’ve just realised the washing has been in the machine for about eight hours so I’d better hang it up inside.

Name changer that sounds incredibly tough and you are doing amazing, can't imagine how difficult it is but keep going.

Emenem I haven't had to isolate yet but dreading it if or when I do. Hope you are coping.

No outs yesterday as a busy day but I have done well today, saw a couple of travel mugs we don't use as they taste of stale tea now so chucked them then felt on a roll, identified a few more kitchen bits we don't use and got OH's agreement to get rid.

Consider yourself kicked Stealth! I can sympathise with the feeling, I'm not in the zone at all at the moment.

Sorry to hear you are having to isolate ememem. Fingers crossed that you stay well.

I finally dropped off the last two charity shop bags that have been in the car boot for weeks although I probably counted those things months ago! I've also just been going through some files and have a pile of papers and receipts for items we no longer own to shred.

Got the laundry folded yesterday and today we took uniform to school to donate it to second hand uniform sale next term . Also took in cards and a present to the teacher . We are not big drinkers so decluttered one of many champagnes in the wine fridge I keep on buying for special occasions then we don’t drink when DH has a migraine / I feel poorly or have taken painkillers . Also gave him a box of truffles from the gift drawer .
A dump trip planned for tomorrow again so should then get a bunch of crap out of the house , charity shop well leave another week i think while I declutter toys . I was thinking DH can start bringing me DD toy baskets and books down to look trough then it won’t feel so overwhelming this worked for me before when the entire job seemed too much . I’m someone who can’t stop when I start if I see it I have to do it even if to detriment ( being late for something , crippling myself doing too much ) and I don’t feel up to her whole room right now . However I have already done her wardrobe so this would continue the room and eventually I’ll be done it’s not that big a room it’s just a mess and she wants to get rid of pretty much nothing. If she interferes too much I’ll have to do it while she’s at grandmas this summer .
She finished school today so getting rid of school uniform , shoes , bags , broken pencil case stationary etc ,she’s moving schools . Looked through school books last night which I enjoyed greatly and will keep for now . I threw away homework record and random bits of pairs though .
Out recently :

• old socks ,bobbly uniform etc to rag bank

and clothing collection

• good uniform donated to old school ( 5 winter dresses , 6 white shirts ( don’t know how she kept them clean although I do have a bleach pen !) ,3 sweaters , 3 summer dresses , a cardigan , 4sport skorts, shorts , 2 pairs of sweatpants ,games top, a new painting apron (DH couldn’t find the duffel coat I’ve had dry cleaned and gotten ready for this so that’ll have to go to charity shop later , blazer needs cleaning first ditto raincoats and the dress she wore today before they can be donated )
• school shoes and mucky trainers ( might keep her newish hockey shoes though I just changed her into new ones )
• School rucksack , sports bag , music bag and boot bag which are all worn out
• random paper , homework diary etc
• dirty pencil case broken school stationary
• champagne ,chocolates and cards to teacher
• a sharks tooth kit we gave to all her friends at school as leaving presents DD got one too is being used up but the few teeth saved
• 3 board games and 3 books going as presents to a party tomorrow

Oh and forgot more DD now laundered clothes to charity shop

• 2 sweaters
• shorts
• baby blanket
• 2 dresses
• DS t- shirt
• Dh pyjamas he never wears to clothing bank

Also a few more books to the dump collection