How judgy are you?

[Jennyyy]

Be honest! When you go to people's houses, what do you look at??

For me it's pets and beauty products. I am disgusted when I see litter trays or overflowing pet food! And I always wonder why people don't put their face creams etc away. I hide all mine so that no one knows how vain I am! Unless they peek in my bathroom cabinet...does anyone do that?

God no. I go to friends’ houses to see my friends. I couldn’t care less about their face creams and make up. We all use them. Why pretend otherwise?

For all you know the pet areas were tidy when you arrived and while your host has been busy making tea for you their cat has spilled the food and litter.

I guess you're a better person than me then! Of course I go to see my friends really. I was just trying to be lighthearted. I think everyone has a little judgy side really...although maybe not!

I'm very house proud, so admit that I don't like hanging out at the houses of my friends who don't clean very often. It makes me feel anxious to be in a house which is cluttered, messy or dirty.

But otherwise, my main judgement is how cold it is. If it's a cold house, I automatically find it uninviting. I know a lot of people who seem heater averse and it's awful being invited there for coffee knowing that you're going to have to wear 10 layers!

No I don't judge my friends housekeeping. Why would it just be her fault anyway? Partners and kids are messy. I'm there to see her not a showroom. I'd judge an unkind friend but one with a messy house, naw. I don't think you can judge without the other person picking up on it even subtly. Humans are damn good at knowing how the other feels without any words needed. What kind of friend sits and judges someone who is struggling or just happens to comfortable enough to let you into their space when it's not perfect?

No, I don't judge. My parents are incredibly judgy, I used to hear all their judgements as a child. I never wanted to be like that and if I ever catch myself making snap judgements about anything, I give myself a stern talking to.

What kind of friend sits and judges someone who is struggling or just happens to comfortable enough to let you into their space when it's not perfect?

^This. My house is spotless at 10pm every night but by 10am it’s a mess as I have 3 under 5. I would never want to know a person who thought I should be cleaning for their visit rather than enjoying a relaxed Sunday playing with my family. These sorts of judgments don’t make space for the reality of how homes are used.

Homes that are immaculate all the time make me uncomfortable. I feel as if I might be causing a mess just by sitting down. People are different. Everyone should have a home they are comfortable in. If this means some clutter does it matter. As said before I go to see my friends not their homes.

Okay I will hold my hands up with you @Jennyyy. I'm a bit judgey; I'm not proud of it, it's not a nice quality I know that but to be honest most of my friends' houses are cleaner than mine so I usually just feel inadequate!

I notice every single smudge, piece of dust, random thing not put away in my own house but honestly don't notice or care much about other people's houses. In fact, the messier they are, the better I feel about my own!

I don't like seeing wastepaper baskets with things in them.

Unless it stinks or unsafe( hygiene or just clutter) then I don't care.

Gonna have to hold my hands up here. I'm very judgey. I dnt mean to be I really dnt. But I try and keep my house as clean as I possibliy can. When I go into other people's houses I just feel.so uncomfortable if it's messy. I have a friend. She stated she does a massive clean Mon/Tue. I've been in her house after a clean. There is hair and black stuff all at the bottom of the toilet sink/ toys everywhere and the kitchen. Dnt get me started on the kitchen. . I dnt mean to be judgey I just couldn't do it. But then i suppose when you come from a farm house with 4/5 dogs in doors house was always messy as step-mum thought it was beneath her to clean. So now I think I've gone the complete opposite.

No, I do not judge. Who needs enemies when the friends that you invite into your own personal space are sitting there judging your housekeeping abilities?!

The only things I judge are no soap at the sinks and changing nappies on dining tables.

I hold my own home to a high standard and always have done as I'm fussy like that personally, but I don't overthink my friends' ones unless there's something really bad. (I had a friend who had 3 cats, civil war over litter trays so there was cat shit and piss on the carpet and the place was unhygienic and stank. Didn't seem to bother her 😳).
I don't really like bins without lids in bathrooms. Looking at discarded intimate items is a bit gross. But that's it really.

I notice but don't judge, iyswim? Generally with relief actually (phew- here's another house where there is a stack of school papers shoved under the fruit bowl and a toy explosion all down the hallway...)