Calling all domestic goddesses....

[AlfieBear87]

How oh how do you motivate yourself to keep your house clean and tidy?

I am a SAHM due to our current circumstances (something I never thought id be) and am really struggling to keep the house clean and tidy. My 9mo son is really well behaved and is quite happy to play by himself for an hour or two so I have no excuse not to do the housework.....I just don't.

My husband has recently renovated our house, working evenings and weekends to do everything himself to keep costs down. And I can't even be bothered to keep it clean and tidy.

Please please give me some suggestions to keep myself motivated to do it. I just find it so tedious and non-thankful work. I'm such a lazy ungrateful cow and really need to change - please help!!!

the only system that worked for me is flylady - the website is good - and there is a support thread on this section - and basically the main thing is setting a timer for 15 mintitue

• and I know this is the stand but it there any chance you are a bit depressed as you sound quite hard on yourself

I've thought maybe I'm depressed but I really don't think I am. Everything else in my life is going really well, no complaints about anything. DH very supportive, DS is ace and we have lots of fun together, we have another DC on the way and good friends and family.

I just can't seem to get off my butt at the mo to do any housework! It's not even that I hate doing it, more like that I don't really care if the house is messy if you see what I mean! If we have friends or family around then I run around like a mad hatter for a couple of hours trying to get things more presentable :)

I've always been pretty good at everything I do (education and work wise) but now I feel like I'm letting my family down. DS is happy so that's the main thing (we play lots together during the day etc) but I feel like I'm letting DH down (although he's never said anything about it).

That's the thing tho - you're a Stay at home parent, not a housekeeper! Playing with your baby is a really good use of your time :)

I'm a SAHM, mine are 6 and 3. Things are a bit better than when they were small, mainly because I can rope them into helping tidy up.

I tend to prioritise keeping kitchen/bathroom clean enough for basic hygiene, then we all muck in as a family to sort out living room/bedrooms at the weekend.

AlfieBear87....Are you my twin sister ...I know exactly where you are coming from ..I feel the same . And now I have let it get so bad ..I just dont know where to start....even though I want to and its getting me down.

It's a viscious circle...but you are not alone !

I'm glad I'm not the only one :)

DH is really good and does quite a lot of it at weekends etc which tbh just makes me feel more guilty for not doing it myself whilst he's at work!

Does anyone know of a good household app? Preferably one that locks all other functions on my phone and shouts 'go and clean the bathroom' repeatedly until I move?!

Hang on Alfie - have just realised you mentioned you are pregnant. So let's get this right: you are busy gestating a child and lavishing attention on your first born and you think you are letting your family down? You sound like you have got your values just right to me! Rest for you and attention for you DC are your no 1 priorities - the house will always be there so just shift it further down your to-do list. Maybe until about 2014?
Someone on another thread advocated finding the Benny Hill theme music on Youtube and turning it up and doing as much cleaning/tidying as you can before it's done. Could you make up a short playlist on Grooveshark of upbeat music and decide that you will clean for the duration and only for the duration of your playlist? My DS and I sometimes do this when there are chores to do and neither of us feels motivated.
Agree with advice about the Flylady and also recommend this book which is the only thing that ever helped me to get on top of the day job of running a home. But then, I am only a very minor domestic deity

Fly lady does podcasts that I believe do that and there is an app that does it but can't remember what it is called.

You are welcome to join us HERE We have quite a lot of new people joining us at the mo.

Thanks marinator you've made me smile :)

Have just signed up to flylady so will give that a go - I'm off to shine my sink :)

enjoy shining but if you are pregnant I agree completly with theancientmarinator - and ignore my comments about depression - house work is the last thing I want to do in the early stages of pregnancy

Hi Alfiebear
I'm a SAHM and have recently been finding it a struggle to sort the house out. DD is 4.6 but ASD and non verbal so needs a lot of my time, which I don't mind at all, but the house suffers!
I downloaded the HomeRoutines app which I have found really helpful. You can adapt it to your own needs, it seems to be based on fly lady but easily adapted. I honestly found the flylady threads on here a bit overwhelming and difficult to keep up with.
Also if I were you I'd talk to DH and explain that you feel like you're not doing enough house wise, I'm sure he'd be glad that you're spending quality time with your DS and as long as things are (relatively) clean and you're staying well during pregnancy I imagine he'll be happy to let certain things slide!

OK I have been spurred on to do SOMETHING !!

I have cleaned the fridge !! All pictures/magnets /silly momentos off the door and cleaned ....IT IS WHITE !!!! Did the inside too....now I cant remember how to put "silly green things" back on the shelves to put them back in properly .

Got to go into superdisorganised cupboard to find manual to see what it looks like...
Disclaimer...it has been cleaned before..but I did not rip everything out in such a rush...I did it methodically (somehow !!)

Well I have not shined the sink as I intended to, however I have put away the four piles of clean washing that have been hanging around for a week so at least that's something.

Thanks Fresh, I'll have a look for that app now.

Bizzey good luck with your fridge!! I need to empty mine of out of date food..... I might wait til tonight for that tho :)

Have you seen the slatterns thread? Might be helpful.

Alternatively, consider inviting people over more often if that's the only thing that motivates you!

Fresh - that was the app I couldn't remember name of.

It has had very very good feedback on its usability and helpfulness in motivation.

I tried slattertns a while ago but it didn't do anything for me ...but ALFIE my girl you have worked wounders on me ...I have cleaned my kitchen windows (need sun glasses now !)

Still havent sorted out the fridge though !!!

Glad to be of service biz :)