If you found out that your 10 year old DD had been given porn to look at when she spent the day at a friends house, what would you do?

[ThisIsDavinaPleaseDoNotSwear]

She is 11 now and this has only just risen to the surface.

When she was 9, she spent the day at a friends house and was given hard core porn to look at in a magazine by her friend.

I'm not 100% sure but I think that the step father of this 'friend' knew what was happening. My impression is that he allows his step dd to view this material but I'm just not sure whether he knowlingly permitted my DD to look through it when she was there or whether this was instigated by her friend.

I am desperatley trying not to make a mountain out of a mole hill here (although both myself and DH are absoloutley fuming that it happened)but I am also concerned that there may be more that my DD isn't telling me.

Shortly after it happened, the girls fell out and this other girl started to bully my dd quite considerably at school. Her parents then moved house and she went to a different primary school but they will be going to the same Secondary School in September.

This other family are a little bit on the rough side (apologies as I know that isn't a particularly nice thing to say but I am crap at expressing myself)

Anyway, do we leave it or do we talk to the parents? (gulp)

If we had known about it last year, at the time it happened we would have reacted quite strongly and possibly even considered calling the police but it's been just over a year now.

I don't know what to advise without knowing more about how your dd came to see this material, but I would not necessarily jump to conclusions about the fact that she can remember so much of it and has been making drawings about it. The drawings actually suggest to me a healthy way of dealing with it in her own mind and consciously processing what she has seen. I also was shown porn mags by a friend when we were 9 and she read out some of the porn stories to an agog audience at school breaktime. They made a real impression on me and I later wrote my own at home based on what I could remember about the ones I had heard. I wasn't traumatised or abused in any way by this experience, although I can see it was not ideal for it to be happening in school to say the least

Actually, thinking about it, I've suddenly remembered finding a stash of girly mags by my father's side of the bed at an early age - we moved from that house when I was 11. Showed them to my friends in a 'wow, look what I found, how bizarre is this' spirit. I don't think I was traumatised or warped by the experience.

Hope that what happened with your dd is as simple as that.