Surgery recovery

[caringiscreepy]

Hi all, wasn't really sure where to post I'm just struggling a bit at the minute. A week out of hospital( for 4 weeks including icu) after viral meningitis and 2 brain surgeries and have been told so many times it was life threatening it's just a bit overwhelming. I know I'm getting better and they wouldn't have let me out if they didn't think so but I just feel constantly aware that I could have left my children without a mother so easily. Has anyone been through this and any tips to deal with the mental side of things? My family have been great , I just feel at a bit of a loss. The side effects from all the drugs I'm
On aren't helping either I guess

Gentle bump

Sorry to hear you’ve been through this.
I had brain surgery 3 times in the space of 3 weeks after developing a brain abscess following the removal of a brain tumour.

I remember feeling guilty at what I put my family through, I was barely conscious at one point but remember hearing DH telling DD yo go and stand out and wave down the ambulance, he says she was really brave.

It’s only natural to feel scared for a while, it took me a bit to get over it all, I was off work for months!

A week is nothing, be kind to yourself and I promise, time really is a great healer.

You’ve been through more in the past few weeks than most people do in a lifetime, so please be gentle with yourself. Take it easy, take your time, do things that make you and you family happy. Don’t sweat the small stuff. You’ll have good days and not-so-good days, just do what you can. Gradually, as time passes, you will get back the confidence in your body.

You've both made me want to cry , thanks so much for your kind words. The guilt hits the nail on the head and I know it's completely illogical. My parents have shielded my dcs from so much and they've been so brave. I was born with no patience but you're definitely right I need to be kinder to myself, just going to be a long road I think! Thanks again

Oh sweetheart, please don’t cry (unless you want to, of course, here’s a hanky! ).
These days, we’ve forgotten the need for convalescence, especially necessary after a serious illness. Even the tv advertisements would have us believe that we can and should be back at work being brilliant, whilst we have the flu, just take a ‘magic lemon drink with paracetamol’. It’s nonsense.
It takes time to recover, physically and psychologically. Take your time. Take a Marie Kondo approach to life - if something doesn’t fill you with joy, then it isn’t important.

I’ve just done an advanced search on threads in my name in General Health in 2014 and found a few like this. I sound a bit shell shocked in that one and that’s only after the first operation!

Stays in ITU are known to be disorientating and scary, have you had the opportunity to talk through how you are feeling about it all?

I kept in touch with someone from the hospital and we’d meet up for a chat sometimes as something like that is hard to relate to for people who haven’t experienced it.

I kept most of my moaning from my hospital bed threads in Chat on purpose so that they’d disappear but it’s been weird looking at some of them as it all seems a lifetime ago now.

I was scared getting to normal life as you feel vulnerable for a while but it wears off with time.

Aww I know how you're feeling. In Feb I was diagnosed with Colon cancer and had surgery in March. I've been told that I'm in remission but the last 7 months has been horrendous.
I also have a newly diagnosed heart problem too, so I was at high risk during surgery.
But. Now. It seems overwhelming. I have 5 years of surveillance to contend with and that means scans and blood tests ever 6 months - and then the waiting for results is sheer torture.
I know life goes on, but sometimes I feel quite panicky after going through all this.
Be kind and take time to reflect.
Do what pleases you.
I'm here if you want to chat x x

Oh thank you all and borntobeamum that sounds horrendous and I should stop my whinging ! I was so delighted to be out of hospital that I didn't expect it to be so hard and my body to be so completely pathetic! I did speak to the meningitis now helpline who were relatively helpful and helped me get my head around that it shouldn't come back and all these side effects are normal but I do struggle a bit with icu flashbacks and the emotional stuff. Thanks for all the advice it has definitely helped me feel I'm not alone. Lots of love to all who have been through this and lots of strength to you born