Self- confidence have you got it? How do you get it back?

[estobi1]

I feel as though I have lost a lot of self-confidence since my dd was born and having had two years at home with my DD. I am back at work now but about to go off again on maternity leave with db number 2.

I feel as though I have lost a lot of my self-confidence and doubt myself constantly. I didn't want to put this on a feeling depressed thread as I really want positive energy and tips from all of those people who manage to glow with self-confidence. I know that deep down everybody has their doubts and I am not expecting to be perfect, I would just like to like myself a bit more and not feel so anxious.

So at times when you are feeling a bit low, how do you keep your pecker up?

I visualise someone I admire for their confidence and pretend I'm them. It works sometimes but if I'm having a really bad day then I just want to get home and lock my door. Depends on my general mindset. Is your partner supportive? - mine is great and it really means the world to me that I know I can always count on him. Just thinking of this can give me a boost too. Hope this helps a bit. xx

thanks chip butty. Yes dh is great but he has his own stresses and I don't want to be a moaning minnie!.

Writing that post actually helped to activate my own usual strategies -

Don't compare yourself to everyone else

Think of a time when you felt really great and remember how it felt

Stop being critical or hard on yourself

Ban the word should!

You are the same person you were before, you have become someone's mum and that can take over and you lose something of yourself and your personality if you're not careful. Try seeing yourself as the person you were before you had DD. Everyone else will still see you that way esp if you've gone back to the same job.
Think positively, dress in clothes you wore preDD, put on makeup, do your hair.
Try not to talk about DD when you're at work, ask people about themselves, all that stuff.
I bet you'll find you feel more confident when you see a positive response from people.

Its a difficult balance really because your dd is one of the most positive aspects of your life and remembering that can be so empowering. But its bloody knackering as well! I am going to have my hair done this morning and that should make me feel really nice.