Anyone's DP had a heart bypass?

[oenophilia]

Looks like he just needs a single bypass and they're saying a week's stay in hospital. Just wouldn't mind having an idea what to expect when he gets home. I know I'm the world's least sympathetic nurse - no patience at all, with myself, him or the DCs, so will I need to buy in some help (no family nearby)? Will I have to take time off work too? Anybody with any experience?

He will be discharged after 4-7 days, and should not be left alone for long periods for the first few weeks. So you should take time off work or at least get someone in to help you.

He will not be cleared to lift anything heavy for about a month, so you will be doing everything in terms of shopping and laundry, although he will be able to do little jobs like making tea and light cooking. The surgery and recovery normally leads to feeling up and down - a bit like having a baby. Some people get full blown depression, most have a milder version, very few have no periods of feeling down.

He will have a walking program to do. He will build up from walking for a few minutes a day in the days after surgery to walking for 30-40 minutes a day by 6 weeks post op. Doing the walking is a good way to beat depression. He may feel like his recovery is slow, but get him to think in terms of weeks not days.

You will need plenty of freezer meals, and help with the children. The emotional stress will mean that you will be exhausted. Depending on what type of work he does, he may be able to start on reduced hours at 6 weeks, building to full time by 3 months. But it might take longer, everyone heals differently.

thanks Buggedoff - I suspect that we are both so relieved that we finally know what's wrong that we're a bit fingers-in-ears about what it really means for everyone. I can't help thinking that he might recuperate faster anywhere but here with 4DCs on a non-spot in-&-out. will need to think about the practicalities a bit more.

My DH had a single bypass in June last year. Surgery on Friday and discharged on Wednesday. First few days he was in quite a bit of pain and needed help to get in and out of bed and the sofa. I took just over a week off work. I too am not a natural nurse type so this was long enough for both of us. It also gave him time at home during the day to start to build up confidence to do things himself. The walking is very important though and a bit of gentle bullying to get him to try each day was needed.

We have 1 school aged DD and there was about 2 weeks of term left when DH was discharged so this helped. In the summer holidays we used the holiday club at school. We gradually reduced the hours as DH recovered. I am not sure this would have been practical with a larger family.

DH went back to work part time in October and is back to full time now. He is doing a swimathon next weekend and a charity bike ride in June. He still has some way to go to qualify for Rio 2016 though

I am sure each patient recovers at a different rate and if your DH is otherwise healthy he may find it is only a matter of weeks recovery.
It sounds like you already have it quite full on in your home with 4 DC so it would probably help to have some extra childcare in place to give yourself a break and provide some quiet time in the house in the first week or so.
I found all the staff at the hospital to be reassuring and knowledgable. They were really good at explaining what was going on which helped me not to worry about the surgery. Make sure you look after yourself and not just everyone else. Best wishes to you and your DH.

Glad to hear your DH has recovered so well Lizaa. Our DC are bigger -from 10 to 16, so big enough to do plenty of things for themselves but also big enough to be loud and shouty and door slammy and inconsiderate I.e. normal teenagers! We've got a holiday booked for early August but I guess it's just too soon to know if that's still a runner. Think I can handle the nagging to get him out for walks - he'll be desperate to get away from me

DH attended a wedding in Cornwall (3hr drive) about 3 weeks after bypass and a long weekend in London 10 weeks after so a family holiday in August sounds possible. We had to cancel our summer holiday to Florida though as flying and rollercoasters 4 weeks post op was not advisable and probably not covered under insurance.