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Original poster

Dermotillomania (obsessive skin picking)

38 replies

tory79 · 12/05/2013 10:21

Wasn't sure if this would be better off in mental health, but just wondered if there were any fellow sufferers out there who cared to share their experiences or generally chat about it.

My problem is my legs. They are scarred to fuck.

OP posts:
HellesBelles396 · 12/05/2013 12:11

I didn't know there was a name for this. My therapist says it's a way of hurting myself and a sign of self loathing.

FlorenceDaphne · 12/05/2013 12:18

Oh I do this- it's horrendous, isn't it? I pick my legs until there's gaping holes, then pick some more. I just feel that if there's something "bad" or "wrong" like a scab or a hair or pus then it MUST come out.

I also pull out the hair on my head.

I have to attend a wedding at the end of this month and am dreading wearing a dress. I'm applying bio oil each night, but deliberately not looking at my legs, so I'm not drawn to the scabs.

amigababy · 12/05/2013 12:43

I bit the inside of my mouth, for 30 years. With a huge effort of will I stopped for 3 years but due to some stress I an back at it again. I am so annoyed.
I also used to pick spots on my face and back.

the book that helped me stop nibbling is called
Habit control in a day by Nathan H Azrin. It really worked for me, well, for 3 years, so I am going to re-read it and try again. I'm sure it's on Amazon, maybe in the market place.

amigababy · 12/05/2013 12:45

oh, I hair pull too but not so much to cause distress. chewing my mouth is the thing I hate most.

amigababy · 12/05/2013 12:48

and I have read it is a form of OCD.

Original poster
tory79 · 12/05/2013 15:26

Hellesbells I didn't know there was a name for it either until recently. I read about it on a magazine problem page! I was having cbt for other stuff a couple of years ago, and talked about it with the therapist, but I don't think she knew it had a name either Smile Its nice that it does though, makes you feel less alone.

Florence yes that is exactly what I do. Squeeze or pick at something til it bleeds, and continue until the offending item (usually a hair) is out and then pick at the scabs over and over again. There are horrible marks all over my legs. I also use bio oil, but am not convinced it makes much of a difference Sad I really struggle with wearing dresses/shorts etc, because they are sooooo obvious.

Amiga yes I have a problem with spots on my face or arms as well. Fortunately I don't get too many, but when I do........ I will have a look at that book, thank you.

OP posts:
Original poster
tory79 · 12/05/2013 15:27

Out of interest, do your dh/dp's know about this or talk about it to you? There is no way Dh can not have noticed my legs, and I did once tell him what I did a few years ago, but he never asks about it.

OP posts:
noisytoys · 12/05/2013 15:41

DD has trichotillomania (pulls out her hair) she has really big, noticeable bald patches in places Sad

chebella · 12/05/2013 15:50

Just to say 'me too'- my feet (yes, it's disgusting), I try not to but it seems to peak around stressful times (v bad after DS1 was born so maybe it's stress-relieving - ironic as I then get stressed about covering it up!). Used to hair pluck as a teenager but seems to have transferred to feet-picking recently.. I wish I knew why as I can easily keep going til my feet bleed - so stupid!

amigababy · 12/05/2013 15:51

I'm sure it's an attempt to self- soothe subconsciously during stress, either low level or serious stress
DD is picking her adolescent spots now just like I did, and my DM would nibble her cuticles till they bled, which I could do if I wasn't careful. So I think it may be slightly genetic.

chebella · 12/05/2013 15:52

BTW, never spoke about it (as in why etc) but I have told my DH to stop me if I'm doing it and he does, unquestioningly, which helps.

amigababy · 12/05/2013 15:54

chebella, it says to do that in the book I mentioned, to ask someone to point it out and stop you, to help give up, so well done asking him to help.

chebella · 12/05/2013 15:55

Now you mention it, I remember my DM sort of absentmindedly scratching her scalp often - I wonder if it's learn behaviour or you're just more genetically predisposed to it. Actually I think I stopped all this when I used to smoke ( similar 'self-harming/relaxing' type activity too!).

chebella · 12/05/2013 15:59

Thanks Amiga, it's easy to feel ashamed of these things but there has to be a way to break cycles by asking for 'support' - even the type of support that is a 'stop it!' ( normally I don't take 'advice' well from DH let alone a curt albeit friendly 'order' but I hate my scarred feet and the behavior that causes it).how old is your DD? Must be hard to witness for you Amiga.

chebella · 12/05/2013 16:02

Amiga is your daughter old enough for you to address this with her through sharing your own mouth-chewing? Maybe you can 'watch' each other, invent some reward you can 'work towards'?

PurpleThing · 12/05/2013 16:04

Interesting. I do this too (my face is a mess). My ds is tiny but he picks away at any scab he has and scratches my moles when breastfeeding. It really seems like he can't help himself rather than he's copying me.

ariane5 · 12/05/2013 16:06

I do this. My fingers look like they have been in a shredder and they hurt where I pick the skin round my nails. Have done it since I was a child.

I also picked every c pox scab off when I was 9 and am scarred and recently picked my heel and then couldn't walk as had no skin left on bottom of my foot.

I just can't stop doing it Sad

chebella · 12/05/2013 16:10

Well, if nothing else we're not alone!

justabigdisco · 12/05/2013 16:13

I do this. Definitely linked to stress. If I've had a bad day I can just FEEL all the blocked pores/blemishes on my face and I have to get to a mirror as soon as I can Hmm
Good idea about getting someone to point it out. Although my husband does tell me to stop sometimes and I just get arsey with him Hmm

Original poster
tory79 · 12/05/2013 16:19

I never do it in front of dh, but I do do it in front of ds Sad I am desperately trying to stop that as he's 19m now and might start copying.

It is definitely stress related but its also just an ingrained habit now I think.

OP posts:
bonzo77 · 12/05/2013 16:26

Feet with me too, mostly. And spots and ingrowns, anything really. It's only really my feet that are unsightly now. DH does it too, though to a lesser extent. DS is 3 and has started on nails. All my family do it, it was only really as an adult that I realised not everyone does! Hmm

justabigdisco · 12/05/2013 16:50

Oh yes my DD is 16m and I'm desperate not to pass it on to her, but I do sometimes do it in front of her. Must stop...

HellesBelles396 · 12/05/2013 17:28

So:

Skin around nails until it bleeds
Skin on feet until it bleeds
Spots until they bleed (back snd chest particularly scarred)
Dry skin
Lumpy skin
Skin that looks different to other skin.

I do it most when stressed and I hate doing it. I think the therapist is right, I would not do it if I felt good about myself.

amigababy · 12/05/2013 17:43

chebella DD is 17 and gets very self conscious if we remark on her picking, or nail biting.
She wants to do psychology at university a nd be a clinical psychologicist . I might try to get her to read my book as part of her "studies " lol.

When I stopped before I didn't say I was "trying to stop " I said "I am stopping biting my mouth " and I became very aware of my hands moving to my face, as that was the precursor to the next action. Really focussing on your hands and keeping them still, or thinking STOP when they move to the face ( or legs or feet etc) helps to stop the action in it's tracks.

amigababy · 12/05/2013 17:45

and as I did it when I was driving too I would focus on having both hands on the steering wheel to keep them out of mischief.

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