How do your limit your own/ds'/dh's addiction to World of Warcraft? Desperate mother seeks tips

[Fauve]

Ds is 14, nearly 15, and is on World of Warcraft every spare minute he has, from when he gets up to when he goes to bed. His school report has just come, and his grades are suffering.

I know it sounds like it ought to be easy to stop this, but it's partly to do with the social nature of the game. I don't play it, so don't really understand the problem.

You could take it and hide it or tell him he only has limited time on the computer. My friends had that.

Tell him he has 30 minutes a day on it and 2 hours at the weekend and enforce it. Simple.

I have friends who have the same problem but with their dh's, but with a ds I do feel as much as it is hard you really do have to give a time limit or at least make sure all school work is completed to the best of his ability and then allow him to play in his spare time if he chooses. He isn't really a child in many respects so he needs to learn responsibilities, and that other things sometimes take priority.
We had to do this with dss 13 (not warcraft but computer games in general) very tough at first, moping sulking rushing the other things so he could get on, but we perservered. Its still not simple now but he is doing his schoolwork but still spending too much time on the computer IMHO, but as long as he sticks to his side of the bargain we are letting that ride at the moment

Thanks for your replies. Hercules, he says - and dh says he is to some extent right - that you can't play for 30 minutes; it's just not worth it. You have to get a group together and then pursue a quest, and you mustn't drop out. (Incidentally, I dropped out of this thread until now - only just got back on the computer while ds walks the dog )

Having said that, I am seeking to give him time limits like that - eg an hour and a half on two or three weekdays, and the same at weekends. He gets up really early before leaving for school and is on it straight away.

Partly what I'm asking is: if you play WoW yourself, does that sound realistic? Would you agree to it? Or would it be better to have, say, three hours on it on a Wednesday, and ten minutes checking in on other weekdays? I could see that that could work for MN, for example, if someone wanted to limit my enjoyment

He is quite a good kid otherwise, helpful, good at school. But this does feel obsessive. Caykon, your situation does sound like mine.

I just saw this thread - DH and I both play WoW. The 30 minutes thing is sort of true, although there's plenty in the game that you can do by yourself. 3 hours is a good amount of time but once a week might be a bit tricky - what about being able to 'check in' for 10 minutes a day or so, and 3 hours once during the week and once at the weekend or something? Otherwise I think the hour and a half thing sounds quite good.

Is he in a guild at all? Some guilds require players to be logged on a certain amount, which can be a problem for players with limited time.

I've never limited it but it has worn off slightly. Half an hour isn't long enough to do a Quest, especially as other players will be depending on you.
Mine used to play all hours but rarely now.

DS1 15 is the same. I am kicking myself as I bought him the 3 month subscription for doing really well in his last school report. Now he too is addicted and spends every waking moment on the XBox. The fact that you cannot dip in and out seems to be the problem.

I have said I will take it away but then he says he won't revise anyway. His mocks were not bad but he could do so much better. He has no idea what he wants to do with his life which doesn't help. I'm hoping it'll wear off in the New Year but not holding my breath.

Good luck. Not easy laying down the law to 15 / 16 year olds.

WoW is a bit addictive and agree you need at least an hour or so to do anything particularly useful in the game. But your suggestions sound reasonable tbh to me, depending on what he does with his WoW time.

Is he raiding? If so then the three hours once a week is probably preferable for him to an hour and a half three times a week. If he's not raiding, an hour and a half a couple of times a week is more than enough to do a bit of questing and chat to mates. I would ask him about that personally, and negotiate that out between you.

Did you know you can set times he can play? You'd need to take control of his account so to speak. Get his password, go to the Account Management section of the WoW Europe site, change the password and set the times he is allowed to play. If you do it this way you'll need to log him in every time he plays (or everytime he gets randomly disconnected), as giving him the password will enable him to remove the time constraints, but if you're desperate to curb his use of it then it might be an idea?

Thanks for these - very useful. No time to consider them properly now, but will try to discuss with dh over hols and draw up some kind of contract. Glad to hear I'm not alone, either.