Can someone knowledgable about coffee come and talk to me?

[MaMight]

I am talking about ordering coffee in cafes.

Sometimes I have a coffee that rocks my world.

Sometimes I seem to get a bucket of weak piss.

I like strong, rich, velvety, deep coffee. Not too much of it. I then like to ruin it with a large slurp of milk and two sugars.

Sometimes I go to a cafe, they make me a coffee from a machine and it is orgasmically good. Mostly, though, that doesn't happen.

I suspect that it might have something to do with European versus American coffee? Maybe?

Macciato. Dippiato. Slurpiato. Floppiato. What do I need to order to get the good coffee?

And does the good coffee ever exist in large, brand name coffee chains?

oooh ohhh. watching with interest! dying to know the answer!

i love the flavour syrups in coffee, but i feel too much of a twat to order one because i don't ever know what to ask for!

I always get a good coffee (americano - black) in Cafe Nero; Starbucks is routinely shit and so I always ask for an extra shot but even then it's not the same. Have no idea why it's better in Nero's but think it might have something to do with the person making it?

Its such a personal thing.

I think Starbucks coffee tastes of weak wee, and the best of the chains is Costa.

I go double macchiato if I need to stay awake, otherwise just Americano. Don't like those coffees that are all milk like latte or cappuccino or chocamochadingdong. Whats the point? You may as well have a milkshake.

IME small local Italian delis with coffee shops on the side do the best ones.

From what you describe, I'd order an espresso in a large cup and then add milk etc. Slurpiato sounds good.

I hate American coffee. When we were there last, they murdered it with vanilla, cinnamon and all manner of gag induscing sweet milky gack.

inducing

try small coffee shops that have a red sign with white writing on that says "illy". This is the most DELICIOUS italian coffee EVER.

Agree with taffetacat - Starbucks is pisslike, and Costa actually tastes like drinkable coffee.

As a Nespresso addict, I would have to go with Nespresso - but also am an Illy fan.

(Where did the coffee ponce thread go?)

Hm. I love starbucks, hate Costa. It tastes burnt to me.

I would agree about going to independent places and NEVER order coffee from pubs. That way madness (and terrible coffee) lies. (I once ordered an Americano in a pub and got a whole mug of espressos).

Yes, Illy's good. Maybe try a machiatto (which is an espresso "marked" with a bit of foam).

Yes, agree about the Illy coffee - my mil, who is a coffee high priestess, buys that - and keeps it in the fridge. It costs twice as much as any other coffee.