stubborn 22 month old with her food

[madame]

Advice please. dd 22 months has started being really difficult at meal times. I have never had a problem with her eating before, infact she has always eaton really well but over the last 2 months she is getting quite difficult at certain meal times. I give her a very healthy diet and cook all my own things as I want her to eat well, so it's becoming really frustrating when she just says no after a few mouthfulls. I know it's food she likes so that makes it even harder. I don't know the best way to handle it really. At the moment I am just getting her down and offering her fruit which she eats and then healthy snaks in between meals. It tends to be just one meal she is difficult at. She is gaining weight and is healthy and active. I just want to know if I should be doing things differently.

I also worry that she wont sleep at night if she hasn't got a really full belly, paranoid about my sleep as I really need it....

Is this just another stage of toddlers that I am being enlightened too....

DD1 was very fussy and I used to worry about her not sleeping properly as well. She was always fussy about her "big" meal and less so about the sandwiches sort of lunch meal so I switched the two - she had the "big" meal at lunch and sandwiches etc in the evening so I could fill her up with a healthy snacky meal and had the fuss at lunchtime when I was more in the mood for dealing with it. It is heartbreaking when you have cooked a lovely meal and they won't eat it.

As she got older I got more mean and insisted on no snacks between meals, if you don't finish then you get the same meal at the next meal time (covered with clingfilm and put in the fridge and then properly reheated of course!) She still is a bit of a pain with food, and won't eat anything in a sauce - I once gave her a fish pie and she accused me of putting glue in it

DD2 is 19 months and just starting to be more stroppy about food. I am much stricter with her - she loves pasta and is only allowed some pasta if she eats the rest of her meal first for example. HTH

cut and pasted from previous thread:

God, we have a problem with obesity in this country not undereating. Young children and babies do not need a huge amount of food especially if they're still drinking milk. THey have tiny tummies.If a child is of a normal weight then stop worrying. Children are not born fussy eaters they are made into them. I defy any parent who follows the rules below consistently to have a child who is fussy:

1.) Provide a role model. Always eat with your kids. Always eat the same things as they are. Never prepare 'kids food' and 'adults food'. Never have adult meals and children's eating times.

2.) Do not give choice. Put stuff on a plate (a good range). Do not offer alternatives. If you say my child will only eat fishfingers and chips that is because you are only giving them fishfingers and chips. Stop doing that.

3.) Give child as much control over the eating process as poss. Finger food and knives and forks. Recent research suggests there is no need to puree food at all. If a child is old enough to sit up and eat then he is old enough to feed himself.

4.) If child doesn't eat. Calmly take food away. Do not pressure, criticise,fuss or worry. This will cause child to worry and manipulate even very young children will pick up on your worries.

5.) Make food pleasurable. Involve children in preparation from as early as possible. Allow children to make a mess. Let them dip, dunk, smear and splat.

I let mine dunk, smear, splat etc. and am getting so hacked off with cleaning food off the kitchen walls & floor after every meal time... but I guess this is part of the joys of motherhood (deeply ironic tone).

Sometimes I tell a story or sing a song to my toddler, if he is having a fussy day. It seems to take his mind off the job in hand.

I also keep snacks to a minimum between meals, or serve meals 15-30 mns later than usual, by which time he is practically climbing into the highchair.

Sometimes I serve the veg separately as a starter, as there is more chance of him eating it before he gets his mitts on the bits he really likes.

It is hard not to (a) take it personally or (b) worry about them wasting away, but really if your babe is eating 2 decent meals a day, I wouldn't stress.

Thank you all, great thoughts and advice. Last night she hardly had any tea and still slept all night and ate really well this morning so I guess all the worry isn't worth it. Just chill I guess. Thanks so much everyone