Just chucked Ds1's dinner in the bin

[GeorginaA]

Dunno if I've done the right thing now.

Ds1 refused to come into dinner this evening (too busy watching TV). Dh and I have agreed to back off at the moment and choose our battles (we've been having issues with behaviour which have got worse since school's gone back after half term) so we just let him get on with it. Thought he'd join us when he realised he was on his own.. didn't. Ds2, dh and I have finished our meal. Have just chucked ds1's in the bin - natural consequences right?

Now feel really mean and just sitting here waiting for the explosion. Or worse... he might not even be bothered.

ARGH!

WHY don't kids come with a manual?!

Cause and effect, offer him some bread and butter, so he doesn't wake up hungry in the night.

How old is he ??

4.5 - he's now refusing to help dh tidy up - even ds2 is "helping" (he's 18mths) ffs.

This picking your battles thing is hard work. He hasn't mentioned being fussed about missing his food so going to leave it I think. If it gets to the eleventh hour and he mentions being hungry, might offer a piece of fruit or bread & butter as you say...

Goergina - if mine don't help with tidying then I get the black bag out and tell them they've got till I count to 20 and anything that's not put away goes straight in the bag.

As for dinner - I would have put it on the side until he wanted to eat it, but would have made him eat it at the table on his own - not in front of the telly! But as long as you don't waiver and start offering other stuff you should be okay

Yes, I'd normally be stricter about the tidying, but since he's gone back after half term nearly ALL our interraction seems to be us telling him off or him giving us backchat. Hence the picking our battles thing (lots of lovely 'I' statements about how we like to be addressed and concentrating on getting him to school and back without a major paddy are our goals for the week) - but hadn't realised just how hard it is to not make an issue of something that REALLY annoys you!

It's all for the greater good, it's all for the greater good, it's all for the greater good...

GA

I could almost have told you he was 4.5, but did not want to be specific in case he was much older. IYKWIM.

DS has started school, and has gone from being your average 4.5 challenge to MR Attitoood.

We have found the only way to deal with this is to do what you have done.

Yesterday, he wanted some Grissini and then went into one, because they were broken at the ends, show me a bread stick that isn't.

Anyway, I just said sorry I didn't realise they were broken, and put them in the bin, shoved them right down. Then produced two more, guess what broken, I looked at them and said oh these are broken and made for the bin, he shouted, it is OK it is OK I will eat them.

You have to call their bluff sometimes.

Thanks, you've made me feel lots better

The teacher offered me a hug on Friday! I'd virtually had to drag him to school by his arm, we arrived about 10 minutes after the bell had gone. He was in floods of tears, I wasn't exactly dry eyed ... it was horrible. Am just determined NOT to let him wind me up so successfully from now on.

He's FOUR ffs, I'm an ADULT... how hard can it be?!! (Answer: very!)

Rock hard, sadly.

We have just pulled a flanker and told him it is 7.30 so he is in bed.

So.......... off to cuddle up to DH and watch Sunday night rubbish.

I like your style

My 4.5 year old is exactly the same. I think it is genetic! And he does not go to school so I don't have that excuse. SOme days I could happily throttle him!

I've got one too. 4 yrs and 4 months. Just started school and being a complete pain in the arse alot of the time.

He got his dinner chucked in the bin on Friday night.

He had been at the table but faffed about so much, just pushing it round his plate that dp got mad & binned it. Cue tears and 'but I was going to eat it' but then he didn't seem to give a monkeys 5 minutes later.

I really don't know what's for the best when they're like this. Just wanted to offer sympathies. Apparently boys have hormone surges every 2 years that turn them into monsters for a while. Not sure how long it's supposed to last though.