I’ll start by saying IABU but posting here for traffic in the middle of the night.
I have 3 DC and I have emetaphobia. It’s crippling me again the past 6 months. The fight or flight kicked in tonight when DC age 3 woke up with tummy pain. I started cold sweating, heart rate shot up to 125 and I did what I thought was best… text my mum.
she was actually awake and called me. Said I could take DC3 to her house(she’s a 3 minute drive away). So I did.
I bundled my 3 year old into the car, covered in a towel, at 2am.
I can’t carry on like this. But what can I do?
I already take citalopram, I’ve just taken a diazepam. I’ve tried CBT but it was horrific. Exposure therapy that I simply couldn’t handle.
ive started to get full blown panic attacks lately too. Something I’ve not had in quite a while. I hate leaving the house. I don’t want to send the DC to school for fear of them getting sick.
im desperate. I’m not suicidal, but I hate this life. Hate it. I want to be the mum that holds her children when they’re sick(I have done in the recent past, but tonight hit me like a tonne of bricks). I want to take them on days out to fun places that they deserve, not just stay at home incase someone picks up bloody norovirus!