How much support does an elderly parent need after cataract surgery?

[pol123417]

My mum (78) lives alone in apartment needs to have her cateracts removed.
I am planning on staying with her after the procedure overnight , will one night be enough, I thought she would be better in her own environment rather than staying with us (we have stairs and 2 messy teenagers!) Does anyone have experience of supporting a parent through this? I have read up about it but would love to hear real life experience , thank you

My mum had hers done in her late 70s.
With one of them she was offered a last minute appointment and my dad happened to be in hospital.

A friend took her and I picked her up, she stayed with me that night but was then happy to stay at her home (alone as dad was still in hospital) after that.

My dad had his done recently, my brother stayed for one night with the 1st one, the next he was alone he didn't really need anyone there.

Is she having one eye done or both at the same time? I had mine done a couple of years ago, and my son came to stay with me for the first night. After that I was fine to look after myself. As long as it’s all straightforward and she’s not usually in need of extra care, I’d have thought one night would be fine.

I had cataract surgery earlier this year and the number of older people telling me it was a breeze and they were up and about, better than ever the next day, was huge. Pretty much everyone I know over 70 seems to have had it done.

I definitely think she would be better in her own environment taking it easy, and as you usually only have one eye done at a time, she should be able to compensate if her operated eye is blurry for a couple of days.

Help with meals for the first week might be nice.

My 90 year old mother in law had hers done recently. About a month between each one. We were available but she needed no help as she was perfectly capable of administering her own drops.

She needs both eyes doing, but is only having one at a time. Thank you that is so reassuring, she will be terrified bless her, I said maybe she could see GP beforehand and they might give her something.
She had a small stroke last year but has recovered well and in pretty good health considering

Sedatives were offered at the clinic I attended to anyone who was particularly nervous, so maybe check if this would be possible wherever you are going.

My dad had his done at 92. Got taxi there and back by himself and managed fine. My FIL was 95 and managed by himself too. No support needed from us

Hope it all goes well for your mum. Honestly, the fear of the unknown beforehand is the worst part of the whole procedure. The op itself is a doddle and having the second one is a breeze by comparison. One thing I actually found fascinating when I had my cataracts done was the fabulous light show you get while they’re removing your old lens - it’s like your own personal Northern Lights. (The surgeon later told me it’s the light refracting through the defects in the old lens.)

They don’t ever do both at the same time. They do one and then wait to see how you get on before doing the other one. I think the gap is about 6 months. Also if they did both at the same time, you would effectively be temporarily blind. The main thing that she might need help with is the drops afterwards. But she should be fine after a day if she is able to put those in herself. It’s a simple operation and it makes a real difference. Good luck!

My mum (late 70s) had hers done, I drove her home afterwards and offered to stay the night but she said no thanks. She was terrified of the operation but said it was fine and the difference in her eyesight afterwards was amazing.

It's pretty straight forward. Just to add to the chorus though, my father had a complication and needed help for several weeks afterwards. My mother was on hand to do that though.

Usually they do one at a time, but not necessarily. They did with me and most of the people I know, but last week my friend had both of hers done at once. Not sure if there was a specific reason. The temporary blindness is really only overnight, as once you remove the dressings the following morning you’re pretty much ok, as I remember it.

Actually, thinking about it, I had a double trabeculectomy last year (don’t Google it if you’re squeamish) when they did both eyes at once. I’d thought the “one eye at a time” applied to that op as well, but they did both as it was under general anaesthetic and they might as well. I did need help for a couple of days after that, it wasn’t as straightforward as a cataract op.

So I guess it’s not a hard and fast rule.

That's what I thought - my parents and my husband only had one done at a time - but earlier this year a friend had both done at the same time. I was surprised, I admit.

To answer the OP's question - provided there are no other health issues, then the parent should only need someone with them the first night, if all has gone well.

My father got the complication of slight retinal detachment. He had to stay in a certain position for a few weeks, I believe. My mother looked after him.

My 90 year old Dad just had cataracts op 2 weeks ago.
They did both eyes together as he is v anxious so they sedated him.
The eye drops are quite complicated, something like one type of eye drop twice a day for 2 weeks, and another eye drop on reducing dose, 4 per day in week 1, 3 per day in week 2, 2 per day in week 3, 1 per day in week 1. Check she can cope with keeping track of that, perhaps create a tick box spreadsheet to help her.

My dad’s vision was blurry for few days after but he’s really pleased with op. She will probably need reading glasses so maybe get some of those off the shelf ones so can use phone/email until it settles.

Good luck!

My elderly Dad had them done one at a time. There was no problems at all. He actually drove the same day he had one of them done. He’s stupid like that but he thought it was fine.

One was quite easy, the other hard, just like with most ops. People all respond differently, plus how the surgery is done, and it can be quite surprising how the person you thought might cope better doesn't.
With the easy one, I found taking her, and being around for a few days after to sort the drops, cooking and house chores helped her a lot. Warning my kids about gran's eyes meant they were aware to not bother her (depending on how your kids are, it might be better to leave them at home while you stay with the person). If you can wfh, you will probably be fine to do this while staying with them (obviously assuming your wfh allows work from relative's house!) but if, like me, you can't in your job, booking some time off would be good.
Other practical things-packing what they need, checking emergency procedures etc.

Getting both done at the same time is becoming more common.
One night of you staying is the norm.
As long as she can manage her eyedrops, she should be fine.

You are not blind after the op, the eye they operated on is blurry until the drops that they put in to dilate it wear off. That takes up to 24 hours, and then she should have perfect, or at least much improved, vision in that eye!

if she is already wearing glasses for shortsightedness, consider getting the lens removed from her glasses for that eye, so she’ll have one corrective lens and one without a lense. Otherwise, she won’t be able to wear the glasses until she’s had the second eye done.

The hardest thing for me was opening the eyedrops for the first time! The bottles were really hard to undo. It is a bit of a complicated regime for the first few days, and one of them has to be kept in the fridge. Might be worth writing out a schedule for the day and time of each one.

Do reassure her, it’s completely painless and over really quickly, and the results are great.

Yes it’ll be fine. You can see much better immediately. Make sure she wears sunglasses for a few days because it hurts when light falls on your eyes: they stay dilated for quite a while. No bending over or lifting.

Oooooh yes they do! They’ve done both together in private clinics for some time but the NHS is starting to do that, too

I said “effectively blind” if you have both eyes done at the same time. It’s always like that when you have your pupils dilated for an eye exam or op. I agree that the drops are fiddly and there are lots of them. When DH had his done, he was given a tick chart to fill in so we didn’t forget them

I live alone and had both done at the same time. I needed a lift home but no-one needed to stay with me.

My DM couldn't do the eye drops afterwards at all. So I moved in for a bit, which was hugely disruptive to my life.