Experiences with major repairs to very elderly parents home

[SnowdropDazzle]

Just wondering if anyone could share
their experiences of organising repairs to the home of very elderly relatives?

So my situation is my mother is now very elderly, severely mobility impaired but still getting by at home with daily carers. She is mentally sharp but not capable of dealing with bills/finance in the modern digital world. As many carers may recognise, no one gives you a timeline for how long this caring ‘journey’ will last. This means that some jobs on the house that we thought would not need doing I her lifetime now kind of do. So complete new heating system involving a rip out, new windows… the sort of thing that means I think she would need respite care while it went on.

I see so many difficulties in this route however, I wouldn’t want house repairs to be the defining factor in forcing a move to full time care. I’d really love to hear what choices other people made and how it all worked out if anyone is happy to share.

thanks

We had this situation, but more with an urgent major repair which included 4 days no water, no kitchen for 1mth, and intermittent heating. Took 4months to fix completely. Unfortunately, DM had just come home from a respite stay in a home (which she hated) and absolutely refused to go back/ move in with me. It almost broke me, going several times a day at one point. Trying to co- ordinate workmen with my work schedule was a nightmare, but once she got to know them, a key safe really helped. If you do have an option to access respite, then I would suggest it for her comfort and your sanity!!

It wouldn’t necessarily force a move to full time care though, but would ensure she was safe and comfortable for longer at home

New windows shouldn’t need her to leave her home. I’ve had new windows twice and the trades know what to do, act quickly & it was done & dusted in 2 days without discomfort. All we had to do was clear space in front of windows. I might have taken blinds down. Curtains remained hung but pushed aside tightly.

As for the heating, get some quotes & see what the trades say about upheaval? In my experience a new boiler is not a huge upheaval & new rads are easily replaced modern for old in the same space.

You might be worrying unnecessarily so speak to the trades. Knowledge is power, plans can be made, respite might be a good idea but elders can be stubborn about that. You might find its easier than you think.

Windows are a day or 2 days

We had 3 new rads put in, different sizes, different locations, requiring new pipework, took two days. I think if you're replacing like for like with a new boiler, it should be a day, possibly two

Take her out for the day and leave someone in the house to manage it.

Sadly the house is open plan so new windows would mean no place to sit so she would need to be away for at least a day. Plus she needs constant access to the toilet. Away isn’t easy as my own home isn’t accessible so she would definitely need respite. A day trip isn’t possible as she can longer spend long sitting so it would be very uncomfortable for her.

Replacement heating would be removing a back boiler and draining/replacing all radiators so work to the kitchen and every room in the house including plaster and brick work and removing a kitchen cupboard. I’m guessing the power would need to be off at times and she relies on a stair lift to get to the toilet which she needs frequently and urgently :-(

I suspect one job would lead to another - replacing windows in my own home led to remedial work on plaster/paint. I lived with it cos I had to but I’d never hear the last of it from my parent. I dread to think of the dirt and dust with the boiler work.

Sounds like a nightmare. I was thinking that I could introduce the respite as a holiday. It’s unfortunate that your parent had already been in respite and had had enough of it! I’m really weighing up the need to act to prevent urgent emergencies like you describe and the desire
to let sleeping dogs lie.

I had a property

1 day (couple of hours for survey)

Took several workmen 1 day

Install new heating system, new boiler, air source heat pump

There are different grants available to help if the existing heating is very old, which mine was