Bully teacher

[MagratEsmeOgg]

Hello.
Thank you for reading.

My DS is in comprehensive school.

The first year he was in school was great. Good results, good teachers, good friends.

One or two things but nothing to write home about.

Then last year he had a teacher who seemed to single him out. He would get detention for all sorts.

For being 1 minute late. They are allowed to be 5 minutes late, maybe get a telling off but not detention.
His friend has diabetes and often needs to test his blood pressure, go to the toilet or eat something to help with his insulin. Once his friend asked if he can go to.the toilet and check his blood pressure and the teacher said no. My DS will stand up for his friends and he told the teacher that he needs to do this, and the teacher gave him detention.

My DD was in this school and has confirmed that this teacher would often single out male kids. I have also heard from multiple mums who also confirmed this. He has really been making an effort this year as they said he can move form, if he behaves.

This is a pattern where him and his friend are being targeted and constantly being put into detention for petty things.

This went on all last year.
I was hoping that this would stop this year as he does not have this teacher anymore, but there are other teachers who seem to be doing the same thing.

He is hardly in school anymore because of the exclusions. Today he was excluded, because the teacher apparently asked him to leave the room 7 times and he refused which DS is completely denying. Apparently he said I'll do as I please. This doesn't sound like something DS would say, even if he was being defiant.

I have said to DS about pulling him out of school but he doesn't want to do this. He wants to finish school. Going to a different school would be difficult with location.

This is damaging his education and he is down about it. Not saving he is an angel but this seems to much. Talked to head and he just says you need to do a complaint form.

The wellbeing officer has said that DS has a "reputation" now, and this is why he is being targeted.

He needs to behave himself. Stop making excuses for him. Yabu.

So your son is being picked on by ALL the teachers and has a reputation? Seriously?

He is damaging his own education.

Today’s incident, who told you that your DS was asked to leave the classroom 7 times? He’s not being targeted is he? He can’t follow orders and is disruptive.

Not all.
Wellbeing officer has agreed with us that he has been singled out by the teacher.

Please no bitchy comments.
It's been a really shitty month for so many reasons and I can't deal with bitchiness.

Who have you discussed this with at the school? Have you had a meeting with the teacher? What was said?

You just can’t have secondary aged children who refuse to leave the classroom when told. It’s not fair on the rest of the class who won’t be receiving any form of education whilst that’s going on.

And this is why teachers are leaving. Your kid is misbehaving he is not being picked on. The wellbeing officer's comments were not the positive you think they are. He is being 'targeted' because he can't behave and follow instructions. You need to deal with him and not the school.
FYI I've been teaching over 25 years and if you don't stamp out his disrespectful behaviour he will continue and inevitably not do as well as he should - and you will conveniently blame the school.

He doesn’t have that teacher anymore! All the teachers he has now are bullying him too? Seriously get a grip.

Hilarious that you think all the teachers are picking on him! Sort his behaviour out and I bet you'll see an improvement in the 'bullying'. He sounds like a nightmare!

Honestly Op.. when you go into a sdhool
and imply that all the teachers are bullying him for practically no reason . You're going to get the same reaction as this thread. No. One is going to believe you.
i think a change of school regardless of his feelings might be the right thing for him. It sounds like his teachers are pretty allergic to him now and that's a hard one to break.

Hey @MagratEsmeOgg I don't think anyone is being bitchy or even nasty.

Some teachers are not very nice, like any humans I guess. Most would try to be fair and evenhanded with sanctions. I think you are getting only your DS's side here, which is understandable.

So if the teacher was excessive last year with sanctions – is it possible that they had had enough of repeated poor behaviour? I think that is more likely than that he and his friend were targeted despite doing nothing wrong.

Now other teachers are also sanctioning him. Doesn't that sound like his choices are the common pattern? This: He is hardly in school anymore because of the exclusions. Is that actually the case? Are these fixed-term exclusions? What kind of communication are you getting from the school about these?

Is this the same teacher as before or a different one? Tbh if a teacher has asked a student seven times to do something (as long as that action is reasonable – such as leaving the room if the student is being disruptive) and they still are not doing as asked, then yes, a more serious sanction is likely.

What are you asking OP? What you should do? I suggest the best thing is to meet with the school to discuss the best way forward for your DS. He also needs to be on board with the plan for his education. It's good that he wants to continue school. I infer he is in year 9? Options choices will be coming soon and he might find things get better when he can give up subjects he doesn't enjoy.

You lost me at:

"I was hoping that this would stop this year as he does not have this teacher anymore, but there are other teachers who seem to be doing the same thing."

One teacher could well be a boy-hating bully, but several who are all targeting your son, very unlikely.

Don't challenge me, there are all sorts of reasons why I can't be challenged.

I'm only sticking up for my friend ... That teacher is just picking on me, and that one, and that one ... They keep putting me in to detention for nothing ... I don't know why I got asked to leave the room, and I never refused and said 'I'll do as I please' ... Don't challenge me!

The school aren't ruining his education. He's not even ruining his education. But it's pretty clear who is.

Sorry OP…it is you who is ruining your child’s education.

Best thing for you to do is not to react or act on anything he says happened. Let him take the punishment and grow from that. Butt out.

A child with diabetes having a blood pressure monitor and regularly using it is odd, as is leaving the classroom to use it.

Regarding exclusions, these have to be evidenced and they look bad on the school, schools don’t give them out unless absolutely needed.

@Simonjt She probably meant a blood glucose monitor. However, I went to school with a girl who had diabetes and she was managing perfectly fine measuring during regular break times when necessary. The boy was just trying to get out of class. I'm guessing teachers see this (children trying to get out of class) all the time, which is why some schools have now banned toilet breaks during lessons altogether (a rather extreme measure).