Can mainstream school work for an AuDHD child with cognitive burnout?

[DitheringMusicParent]

DS9 is AuDHD and was badly concussed early last year. He is currently homeschooled but wants to go back to school. This is complicated by two things:

(1) He has always had days of what looks like cognitive burnout, particularly after he's concentrated deeply for a long time the day before. He comes across on these days as not even hearing instructions, not understanding basic academic tasks, as well as struggling to stay on task and complete anything. This got worse with the concussion and hasn't really resolved. It's made way, way worse by putting him in a chaotic, noisy environment with other kids.

(2) He is very good at, and very heavily involved in music, at the level where a career as a musician is reasonably realistic. He can hyperfocus on music when nothing else is working. However, this obviously contributes to the days of cognitive burnout.

To what extent do kids in mainstream school have days where really not much is going in and there's very little output? Is this just totally incompatible with mainstream school?

[N.B. Where we live there are zero accommodations for academically able children who have additional learning needs. There are no EHCPs, no IEPs, no legal requirement for a suitable education - only the right to enrol your child in the school nearest to their house.]

Can only speak for the uk system,

no.

there’s an expectation you engage with lessons each day and while some lessons are more cognitively demanding and others are less this won’t be planned around him and his needs.

UK schools fail mainstream children.

The answer is no.

Can't speak for your country though.

I have a neurodivergent child similar in many ways - minus the concussion but with a chronic neurological condition - even down to the musical talent. And I think no. Mainstream did not work and now in a special school.

Depends on the school. I did work experience earlier this year in a secondary and one child slept/head laid on desk for a whole lesson.

The teacher explained to me that it was best to leave her be on those days, as she’d likely interact and participate the next time, but if they tried to push it they’d lose her for multiple lessons.

Since there’s an actual medical reason (brain injury) here, if you find the right school he will be included and accommodated. BUT you need to find the school that works this way. Look for a middling performance school that is locally known as good for SEN.

In my experience (DD with AuDHD) no. However every setting and every child is different so don't let my negativity dissuade you from trying! I let it go on for far too long though and should have removed DD from the school much sooner than I did; my main advice to you would be don't do that!

No chance. The older the child gets the worse it will be ….. they need to grasp the basic concepts and if in burnout or not present in class it only gets worse.

Maybe look at an online school?

Headway - the brain injury association | Headway https://share.google/bR7qE7INmgn9rLwfZ

This is UK and you are perhaps not but some of the advice may be relevant. Is a music school an option?

I’m an AuDHD parent. You say he wants to go to school? That can be quite powerful as a protective factor. As he is 9, I would try it. You can keep a close eye on things and move to home schooling again if necessary. When was he last in mainstream school, if at all?

It might be helpful to consider splitting the academics from the social- emotional aspects of school.

Why does he want to attend? Can you prioritise those experiences but take the foot off the pedal for the rest?

Without knowing more about the ed system where you are, it’s hard to guess what’s possible? Is attendance mandated or can you take time off? My ds has a lot of late mornings and leaves early when he needs to.

We’re focusing on the structure, stability and social relationships more than the academics for now. He’s bright, but misses chunks of learning time later in the day, or in double periods, when he cannot process the information after a certain point.

We can afford to support him through a longer educational journey, if he wants, and where we are there are so many ways to access higher education besides the traditional exams.

Without knowing the set up in the country you are in, the answer to this is impossible to know. In the UK a mainstream school would be meant to make accommodations for this and some would utterly fail on every level and some would manage it well. Are there any Autism specific schools where you are? I have a friend whose child is really quite seriously autistic but academically bright and he goes to a specialist autism school where his need are well met.

My dd was mainstream educated, yes we had various issues but ultimately she passed all GCSE’s at a star, something the autism unit didn’t have the facilities to do. She’s professional musician

@Octavia64 @ElefantAndCastle @TurquoiseSloth @Allmarbleslost @gettingcoldernowwarmblanketson yes, this is what I imagine is going to be the case here.

@IAxolotlQuestions unfortunately no schools here are good with SEN. They're a mix of rigid attendance rules, rigid behaviour rules, really poor classroom behaviour, understaffing, under-trained teachers, an overstuffed curriculum with inappropriate expectations... the schools are frankly pretty bad for anyone, but DS desperately wants to go back and mix with other kids.

@Phineyj THanks - a lot of headway's advice is relevant and good. Music school would be fantastic and absolutely ideal and he got into a few in the UK a while back, but there aren't any where we live now.

@Robotindisguise yes, I think we need to give it a go. He was last in a shockingly bad school at age 6. The options i'm now looking at are much better, though see above re the general quality of the school system.

@Phloosie the longer journey sounds sensible, and we may need to do that too somehow. Unfortunately attendance is mandated here.

@stichguru no autism specific schools here, and no accommodations at all. I guess we give it a go and pull him out again when he looks like he's heading for burnout.

@bababamama that sounds encouraging! What sort of musician is she?

If he’s motivated by mixing with other kids, is there another way to give him that? Eg he could do after school and weekend clubs, join an orchestra or choir for example?

That way he’d stay home for academics and for resting time, but still have social time.

We are mainstream but independent - there are some small accommodations the school are making. Uniform adaptation and a trusted person, all staff are aware and they have a full learning profile.

However they are expected to participate in the entire timetable which is full on. They’re also musical and have chosen themselves to be part of the ensembles, they learn one instrument at school and have a fixed time to learn it. One they have lessons at home, we scaffold heavily. Lots of co-regulation in mornings, after school and weekends are very low demand.

Is he medicated? I’m a SENDCo (and parent of AuDHD DS1) and this makes the biggest difference to a successful school experience.

I’m also a music teacher in a mainstream secondary comprehensive school, and our best musician just got the top GCSE grades in the whole school (all 9s, also ADHD).

It can work really well, with the right support.

@PassTheCranberrySauce yes, he's medicated. Super fast metabolism though so when it's worn off, it's really worn off.

@PoloThePolarBear that's all what he currently does, and I think that's likely to be what he ends up needing long term, but it doesn't really give him social practice the way school would. He has friends, but he's missing out on daily practice at the social learning of following expectations, watching others, working with others etc.

@Grain80 that sounds like a good arrangement.

If you don’t find a school that works by the start of secondary, consider an online school? These can be really flexible.