12 Year old, changing schools

[H1ghw4y61revisited]

My little brother is living with my brother and his wife, but is coming to live with me next year. He's in his first year at secondary school, and the move will mean a change in schools. He's had a pretty disruptive start to secondary school and has just started to settle. The plan was to move him after the Christmas break, but my brother thinks maybe we should encourage him to stay put until the end of the school year. At this age, would a change mid year be likely to de-rail his progress education wise, and I suppose socially? I don't have much of a clue about secondary school education right now. Anyone had any experience of a similar change?

quite a few new starters and leavers in my dd's year - just started yr8
personally if you are definitely going to move him, move now and just get on with it.

I'd think moving mid way through Y7 (where the DC are still trying to make new friends and find their feet) would be better socially than start of Y8 (where the DC will have made stronger friendships).

I'd also say move at Christmas. No point staying longer and making friends when he's got to move anyway.

I'd move him now as friendships still forming in yr7 as mentioned above. Also there may be some slight curriculum catch up required eg new school may offer different modern languages.

Thanks. I hadn't actually thought about the fact moving now would be a better chance to make friends, good point. I'm speaking with a couple of headteachers this week to see if we can find a place for him to start in January.

Agreed with the general consensus, better to move now

I agree with everyone else, better to move now, friendships will still be forming so will be easier than the beginning of year 8 I would think.

I agree with everyone else.
My DD is in y7 and is still finding her feet and getting to know new people.

Not knowing the circumstances, but if relevant, the people on the Adoption, Fostering and Kinship care boards are all very friendly. They can be found under 'Becoming a Parent'

teenandtween thanks for the tip! I've not really been thinking of it as becoming a parent but I suppose that's what it's going to be

My (adopted) 12yo still needs a lot of parenting. it is not like having a nearly-adult 16yo come to stay.
So you will have all the things like

• bedtimes
• rules about electronics
• healthy eating
• tidying up after themselves
• when to do homework

etc. You will need to understand what the rules have been before, and what you feel need to change. If he has had disruption in schooling / homelife he may be behind academically and need extra support from you. Also disruption can lead to mismatches in independence skills, being overly grown up in some areas, but needy in others. Plus also possibly emotional issues with anger at the disruptions, but being extra needy and needing confirmation of worth. (Of course depends on reasons why he is moving to live with you, and I'm not asking you to share them here).