Holding my 5 year old son back a year

[RDouglas55]

My son has just started at a new school in year 1. They are considering putting him back a year because he's behind in reading/writing/socialization/communication. His birthday is in January so he's not young in his current class. He's also fairly big for his age. I very much DO NOT want him put into reception with children much smaller than him. He is hating the school and has no friends. Can anyone tell me how I can prevent him being put back a year? Please...

That would be highly unusual in a state school, where the policy is to keep very nearly all children in their birth cohort and then provide appropriate support.

Is this an independent school because, if so, they have a pretty free hand over things like this (although of course you can argue your son's case and, ultimately, look for (yet) another school).

Thanks for that. It is a state school and I need to know how to argue my case. If I get nowhere then, like you say, I will have to consider moving him. Because I am an unemployed single parent, I think they get pupil premium and I feel very strongly they should be using the money to support him with a SEN trained TA either in his class or in a nurture group at certain time of the day.

They can't do this without your agreement and it could have long term effects should you need to move him alter or at secondary transfer age. A teacher can differentiate the work and the school has a duty to be inclusive. A child this age, with no SpLD, can easily make up the ground as they all develop differently and it is very early in the term. I wouldn't assume they get any extra funding on your account unless you apply for FSM but if he has or may have SEN then SENCO is the one to approach about getting assessments, IEP etc.

Thanks very much for your help!

Well, that does sound odd. I thought it might be an independent school because, in the state sector, I know of only a tiny number of pupils who have been held back a year and that has been after a lot of applying and appealing by the parents, never at the school's instigation.

It sounds as if the school don't want to put the resources and effort into supporting your son and regard holding him back as the easier option. I agree you should speak to the SENCO and also pursue the question of your eligibility for FSM (even in the landscape where all infant pupils receive a free lunch) and what then happens to the pupil premium.

It would appear on the face of it to be a bad decision for a January born child who is already big for age. In my ds class there's an August born child or average size held back a year and nobody can tell as he's not the biggest or anything.
IMO you need to get help with reading first. Can you subscribe to reading chest (google it if not heard of) and religiously do 1 book per day? My ds was very behind in year 1 and inside 2 years he was considered a very good reader, one of the best in the class. But I was really strict with it, made him do a book for any sort of reward that would motivate him every single day. As the books from reading chest are levelled, they will all be appropriate.
With maths, you need to get advice from the school about basic areas he needs to do. Can he write numbers 1-10? If not that's the place to start. Write them every morning and every evening for weeks until he is good at them. Also make him represent those numbers with smarties and let him eat them if he gets it right. Try again if not. Then move on. Maybe doubling numbers with smarties or adding 1+1 etc with smarties. Again, inside 2 years, my ds maths completely turned around. He is unrecognisable from the child he was in year 1 but it took me a lot of work.

Thanks very much. My son is eligible for free school meals (FSM) as he was having them at his old school. I currently claim JSA, so I believe the school gets extra funding under pupil premium and it should be used for SEN (or partially so).

Thanks for the tips about reading. I read a book to my son every night in bed. As regards writing, he's very reluctant and doesn't even like holding a ping or colouring in. I feel strongly I need specialist help at this stage. The school shares nothing with me. They didn't even tell me they were putting him in reception until I attended the meeting yesterday.

Can you get the school to identify where he is behind?

Did you get a report at the end of last school year which rated him on about 8 areas, split into 3 areas each (inc maths, literacy, physical, social, communication). Do the two sets of information agree, and does it match with your view of your child?

Are you prepared to say what he CAN do? There are loads of people here who can let you know where you might be able to help him - and not just the people who say "My Y1 child can do quantum physics, write a novel, and read war and peace".

You son is lucky enough to have a Mum who cares about him, and reads to him - those are 2 of the markers for a successful journey through primary school.

If he isn't that far behind, and you possible can, I think I'd keep him with his year group. If he is that far behind, would the school help you get a statement to gain him additional support?

Hope you find a solution you are all comfortable with.