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Original poster

Sex education

22 replies

purpletink · 18/05/2006 12:55

Hi
feeling very proud with myself today - after confronting stroppy pre-pubescent DD last night with the simple...what's the matter? was challenged with the "...and you havent told me about sex!" and a burst into tears! She's only 9!! I'm sure it wasnt such an issue 30 years when I was 9...infact it wasnt mentioned, I would have remembered! It turns out she had been embarassed at school, by being the only one in her year (which I doubt) who didnt know what it was!! Anyway we had a cuddle, and did the complete caboodle - we covered almost everything including the guess the word round! This involved my DD saying "what does the P word mean?" (paedophile), and "what is the R word that happens in Asda?" (rape...she must have heard about that terrible incident on radio news or TV). But the funniest was when after I told her that grown ups sometimes have sex when they dont want babies, just for fun, she said it must have been a bit like skateboarding!!! What do you say?
Has anyone else had similar experiences?

OP posts:

katetee · 18/05/2006 14:49

Mine just said EEeewww I can't believe you and daddy did that TWICE!!! Yes, I have two children.! and I didn't have the heart to correct her. LOL

tigi · 18/05/2006 20:09

There is a small paperback 'sex ed' book, can't think of the author, its done in a light hearted way, and shows them having sex on a skateboard,(and in a hot air baloon I think?) on one of the illustrations! maybe that is what she is thinking of!
My 11 yo son resisted any knowledge of knowing anything until just this year. He then did ask me about it, and we had a sensible open chat about it, and he dealt with it all in a very mature 'so that's it!' sort of a way! I also gave him a really good book, that goes into hair, spots, emotions, as well as the usual body diagrams etc!
He also expressed astonishment that we did it 3 times!

Blandmum · 18/05/2006 20:22

DD asked for some information at 6, at age 9 we have now covered reproduction, periods and contraception.

I find that it is best to answer their questions as simply and matter of factly as possible. And when they stop asking more questions, stop telling them things. they tend to ask for the info they need at the time and stop when they have enough.

Mind you I teach sex ed to years 7-13 so I am now bomb proof on this topic and almost totaly unshockable!

motherinferior · 18/05/2006 20:26

So why haven't you answered Beety's anal sex questions, then, mb?

morningpaper · 18/05/2006 20:26

@ skateboarding!!

Blandmum · 18/05/2006 20:27

MI???????I missed this! Was in work today and then went to the gym! Link please?

Blandmum · 18/05/2006 20:32

OK, felt like a right old perve searching MN for 'anal sex' as it were.

The person on the recieving end enhjoys it because of stimulation to the prostate. Pressure on the prostate can force and ejactuation. Excessive fource is highly unpleasesnt in this area. But recipients get their jollies out of stimulation of the prostate.

The 'donor' obviously likes a rub. as it were!

motherinferior · 18/05/2006 20:33

I shall direct Beety to this answer.

Blandmum · 18/05/2006 20:36

that I know this sort of thing!

There is also the psychological pleasure as well, I would think.

Paraplegic men can donate sperm to father children by having their prostate stimulated to preciptate an ejaculation

plummymummy · 19/05/2006 02:01

wow mb didn't know that.

homemama · 19/05/2006 13:30

Lol, MB!
I do the sexEd for Y5&Y6 and I'm sure the content is what previously would have been taught at Y10&Y11.

The funniest night of the year is when we do the 'parents preview' meeting. We always do wine and cheese and after a few glasses they ask as many questions as the kids do the following wk.

It always makes me laugh when they seem happy with the nitty gritty Sex Ed but have a problem with me teaching masturbation. It frustrates me when they ask to opt out of that bit.

nikkie · 19/05/2006 20:08

I am doing a 6 week sre course at the moment and went on a sn sre course last year but haven't taught any yet,(have had some small chats with pupils though.)
I did interpret sex ed a couple of years ago, the signs are very intresting

EmmyLou · 19/05/2006 20:18

The funny book is 'Mummy Laid ann Egg' by Babette Cole and it shows lots of funny ways that Mums and Dads fit together.

'Hairs in Funny Places' is meant to be a good all round puberty book but haven't got round to getting that one yet even tho' dd1 is year 6 - sort of hoping school sex ed will answer most questions that haven't been asked at home.

DominiConnor · 21/05/2006 18:04

At 9 her friends will have various amounts of knoweldge and she loses social status by not knowing as much as them, or rather as much as they claim.

That makes it sound small, it's not to them.

Also at 9, her periods could start any day now.

Blandmum · 21/05/2006 18:15

Not that common for a girl's periods to start at 9 DC. Obviously it does happen, but the average age of merache in the UK is 12 years and 11 months. 9 would be quite young. In practice girls tend to have to reach a weight of around 7 stone before their periods start.

EmmyLou · 21/05/2006 18:38

Wow - didn't know that MartianB - can you recommend any books (for parents)for a mother of 3 girls whose eldest is nearly 11?

Can't remember when my periods started or when i started to wear a bra - guess would have been more aware of it if had been much later (or earlier) than other girls at school.

Blandmum · 21/05/2006 18:41

can't think of anything if I am honest. We use a text book in school. She will be getting sex ed in year 7 for sure. Have a shufti in the local library, and see if they have anything good that you could look at together.

nikkie · 21/05/2006 18:45

Family Planning do a lot of child friendly leaflets.We were shown loads of samples on my course think you can just go in and ask.

motherinferior · 21/05/2006 18:45

DD1 (five) asked me today how you could tell that it was the sort of hug that made babies.

We were, needless to say, walking along the street at the time.

Thank heavens for Babette Cole.

Well, darling, you remember those pictures, well sometimes mummies and daddies do a special sort of hug - and yes you can tell what it is - for babies or even not for babies and then there are the babies who are made not with special hugs and, er...would you like some chocolate?

cocococo · 22/05/2006 16:49

I got a review copy of a brand new book today "What's Happening to Me" £6.99 'a straightforward and reassuring guide for girls, providing reliable advice in an accessible format.' the blurb says. I have just had a quick look and it covers things like when you need a bra, why you feel moody, what periods are like etc It seems really good. it's by Usborne and new out ISBN 0 7460 6995 2 And no, I am NOT an Usborne rep!!

hana · 22/05/2006 16:53

Another good book for discussion and pictures is called 'Let's Talk About Sex' - can't remember author's name, but is widely available.

Freckle · 22/05/2006 17:01

Endorse that, Hana. It's by Robie H. Harris and published by Walker.

We've had this since DS1 (now 12) first started asking questions about bodies etc. Now as he's been going through puberty, if he has a question, I just get him to read the relevant chapter and then we talk about it. It has simple diagrams and covers a wide range of topics.

My one reservation is that, although it discusses relationships, it doesn't mention marriage - which may suit some but not others.

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