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Original poster

What marks did you get?

19 replies

Nightynight · 20/12/2005 19:49

do you ever ask your children this?

I was intrigued by martianbishops comment on the Prescott thread, that children do best with no marks, just a comment.

My childhood was ruled by marks, because I knew how important my mother considered them.

OP posts:

tortoiseshell · 20/12/2005 19:50

Oh yes, every night after school I would be quizzed on marks, not only my own, but also everyone elses, to make sure I was getting the highest marks! I don't EVER ask ds!

Original poster

Nightynight · 20/12/2005 20:03

lol sorry to inflict the question on you again then tortoiseshell!

OP posts:

Hallgerda · 21/12/2005 09:48

Yes, I do ask. Only ds1 ever seems to know what his marks were though (and yes, he does get the highest ones, usually - either that or he's been fibbing all these years...). I don't think it's an unreasonable question, especially when coming up to the secondary school admissions time. Schools (or at least the one my children go to) tend not to give parents information on how their child is doing relative to the rest of the class - and without that information, how do you know whether it is worth applying to a selective secondary school? On the other hand, I would be worried if my sons' lives were ruled by marks, and I would like their school work to be motivated more by an interest in the subject matter than a requirement to do well. So at home I try to talk more about what they're doing than how well they're doing it.

Blandmum · 21/12/2005 09:54

I'll fess up here, as a mum I'd love to be told my kids marks and standing in the class

As a teacher I know that isn't as important as knowing that they are making suitable progess for thm!

FestiveFrex · 21/12/2005 09:59

I go through DS1's backpack every evening and check all his different workbooks. I don't need to ask his marks as they are there for me to see. I have no idea where he comes within his class though. He's in secondary school. I only know marks relating to the younger 2 boys if they bring home a test which has been marked (junior school).

spacedonkey · 21/12/2005 10:16

I don't ask, but my kids always insist on telling me their marks!

feastofsteven · 21/12/2005 10:18

same as tortoiseshell. I will never forget that getting all A's for my mock GCSE wasn't sufficient for my mum. She wanted me to come in the top 3 in the class for most subjects .Bearing in mind I was at a very academic private girls' school (assisted place) I think this was a bit unreasonable!

Blandmum · 21/12/2005 10:21

fos, I think we shared a Mum. I was in a comp but my mother was never realy satisfied with my results. I once got 98% in a Latin exam and she asked me what happened to the other two marks! And she was quite serious. I'm not sure if this wasn't her way of making sure I didn't get 'too big for my boots'. She had very little chance for an education herself, so that could have been part of the reason too, I suppose.

feastofsteven · 21/12/2005 10:26

you are me MB!!! Latin was my best subject and I would get ridiculously high marks like 96/97% . I think my mum was disappointed with her life (felt like she had failed as she was an unmarried mum on benefits ) and was 1)vicariously living through me and 2)was so keen on wanting the very best for me that she sort of lost sight of my happiness/self-confidence in the process.

(oh dear, sorry for hijacking this thread with my "mother" issues")

Blandmum · 21/12/2005 10:28

I rather liked Latin , but the teacher was a real perve, and I wanted to do sciences so I dropped it before O level.

I always thought that latin just 'read' like English, IYSWIM

Mistletoo · 21/12/2005 10:33

I used to get asked and I asked but it had nothing to do with who they 'beating' or what position in the class they were, it was for the same reason the teachers marked - to see how well they were coping with the work and to see if they needed mine or dh's help.

I'd be shocked if parents didn't ask how their child was doing at school or how they did in a test or exam, I can't believe a parent would be so disinterested.

feastofsteven · 21/12/2005 10:34

We only had 2 male teachers at our school , so no need to be worried about perves. My Latin teacher was lovely, but did have a funny habit of wearing some rather low-cut tops!!!

FestiveFrex · 21/12/2005 10:56

mb, you didn't go to my school did you? One of the latin masters there was a real perve. Mind you, didn't stop me doing A level Latin. I remember he made us (4 girls in an all-girls school) translate Ovid's Ars Amatoria. Some of it was downright pornographic and we'd all pretend we couldn't translate it because we were so embarrassed!

Blandmum · 21/12/2005 11:01

He used to play posket Billiards a lot! And give us tests, and if we dropped a mark we had to stand on he chairs and desks so he could look up our skirts!

maZebraltov · 27/12/2005 04:41

dumb question but when do they start getting marks? DS is 6 (yr 1) & still I haven't seen any @test results@ for him...

SueW · 27/12/2005 08:00

Spelling tests, maths, comprehension/sentence work usually get marks or at least you can see how many they have got right - do all those crop up in Y1?

DD's (Y4) teacher uses WILF (What I'm Looking For) forms for their English work. Doesn't involve a grade/mark but useful guidance.

Pruni · 27/12/2005 09:09

Message withdrawn

veuveclicquot · 27/12/2005 09:43

My school used to publish 'interim orders' every term which showed your marks in each subject and your position in comparison to the rest of the year.

I didn't mind at all. I would probably be interested in DDs when she gets to school age, but not to push her to be number 1, but to see if she needed help anywhere.

Tortington · 28/12/2005 01:51

we just go by the end of term reports. dh went up the wall at ds2 (12) for piss poor performance at everything. i then had to tell him to apologise and give him a kiss without the manly punch on the arm think ( pisses me off that macho i'm giving you a kiss but am still a mans man shit..anyway i digress)

on the up side - made his twin sisters report look fking brilliant!!

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